As far as your “having all that [your list of Requirements in a (male) Partner]”, well, even to be on the same page I’d have to take your word for it….As far as your “knowing others who have it too”. No. That’s asking for too much suspension of disbelief. You want to tell me that you, + a quantity of other (women) known personally to you, have marriages with men who fill that “by no means comprehensive” list of requirements you have of them — while not (necessarily) GIVING one damn thing to the relationship?
Such marriages by their very definition, would either have dissolved or be on their last legs. Why would any woman in the Western world stay with a man who didn’t even have his sense of SELF preservation intact, let alone one for a family? Especially with the added temptation for her to squeeze every last resource out of such a wretch before, inevitably, leaving him to die in the stream of natural selection.
Almost every woman 18–35 nowadays who manages to get married (to a man) is, again, by definition, married to a man not worth having.