My Bipolar Struggle

Scituate Lighthouse. Scituate, Mass 2008

I was first diagnosed as being Bipolar in 2007. After a hellish separation from my wife of 13 years and moving back home to live with my sister’s family I began a slow dissension into darkness.

My mind was not all there, in fact it still isn’t in some way, I began counseling and seeing a prescriber. Everything seemed to be okay, but it wasn’t. My behavior changed so much that I lost many family and friends who chose to avoid me or tell me to snap out of it.

Yeah, okay that would work. I lost my management job which caused financial issues. I became a recluse avoiding those who still cared. I wanted to end it all and started planning. I saved my prescriptions and contemplated taking all of them before laying in bed and hoping I would just go in my sleep. Somehow the phone rang. It was my youngest son, wanting to know when I would be coming to see him. How could I do this to him?

After several hospital stays I began to rebuild my life. I hope to share my story with those who are struggling and those who have survived and deal with their mental health issues daily.

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