An EU-Citizen’s perspective on Brexit
Following my brief appearance as audience member in last week’s BBC Question Time I received a lot of feedback and comments on Facebook and Twitter. The overwhelming amount of these comments was positive, many coming from fellow EU citizens and Brits living abroad in the EU, expressing their support and sharing their own stories and experiences. The negative comments from ‘leave’ voters seem to suggest that people didn’t really understand my frustration and indignation, and amidst calls for me to stop whining, to accept the result of the referendum or move back to Germany, I felt part of the picture was missing.
So I would like to elaborate a bit more on what I said and share a little bit about my life here in the UK.
About me and my family
I am a EU citizen, I grew up in Germany, and when I came to study in Liverpool in 1998 a whole new world opened up to me through my studies and work as community artist and choir leader. It soon became clear I was here to stay, I found a job, made friends, I settled into life in the UK, and often joked about the quirk of being the “foreigner”, the token European. Everything I love about the UK, about Liverpool and Merseyside is the very reason I came here to study, to live and work (Do mention: the vibrant arts scene, the cosmopolitan atmosphere and multiculturalism, the music, the clubs, the beautiful Northwest landscape and the proximity to beaches, mountains and assorted stately homes, and of course New Labour’s understanding of the importance of creative expression, community arts and its beneficial impact on communities and people), and I could roll my eyes at anything I didn’t like. (Do not mention: “bread”, the lack of mixing water taps and the uncoordinated public transport system, never mind football or the war.)
In 2003 I met my husband-to-be dancing at Heebie-Jeebies, we fell in love, bought a house together in Wallasey and started our very own little European project here in England, my chosen home.
I went back to university for a PGDip in counselling and psychotherapy, and through my work in new media arts, collaborative and community arts, mental health and wellbeing as counsellor and psychotherapist, as expressive art therapist and also as community artist and choir leader I had the privilege to engage with a huge range of people of all ages and from all walks of life across Merseyside, Sefton and Wirral.
Always, without exception, has the question of my nationality been met with openness and friendly curiosity, and conversation would usually lead on to sharing happy stories about visits to Germany, German quirks and habits, beer, wine and bratwurst. After the 2006 World Cup we were even able to talk about football, my hometown of Nuremberg having hosted some of the most exciting matches of the tournament.
After the birth of our daughter in 2010 my work shifted focus towards new parents and families and I set up a sling library and later an independent family centre where together with 5 other women we volunteer our time to support parents and help them with baby slings, wraps and carriers, cloth nappies, car seat safety, breastfeeding support, baby-led weaning workshops, gentle and mindful parenting sessions and more.
Being a parent has made me even more politically alert than I already was, as I became acutely aware of the way politics and policies were shaping the socio-political and economic context in which we were to raise our child. I remember the General Election in 2010, I was very pregnant at the time, and as EU citizen I of course didn’t have a vote. I can still feel the dread and worry in the pit of my stomach as I watched Cameron and Clegg move into Number 10, wondering what was to come.
Everything changed
Over the following years I could see the consequences of the budget cuts and changes in the government’s approach and attitude towards supporting families, nurturing children, early years education, women’s rights, the arts, mental health services, education in general, social care and housing, the disabled — the list goes on.
We were directly affected by all of this, as were friends and family: my freelance contract as therapist could not be renewed due to budget cuts, our local sure start centres first reduced their programme and then closed their doors, friends were waiting months to access vital treatments and mental health services, others were in vain looking for work that would offer a stable wage they could live on, employers ran several rounds of redundancies, and all the while we were listening to the government spinning a narrative that laid blame at the supposed “feckless scroungers” and “work shy parasites of the state”, the immigrants, the EU, Labour of course — in short, anyone else but them. No mention of the Lehman Brothers, the banking crisis and enforced austerity.
It was probably around the time when we started to discuss at length whether or not to send our child to school that I began to fall out of love with England, or rather with Tory Britain, a country gradually brought to its knees first by the Conservative/LibDem coalition, then Cameron’s Tory government and now Theresa May’s Brexit spectacular.
We were lucky though that our overall situation and my flexible working hours allowed us to home-educate our daughter, a decision we haven’t taken lightly, home-education not being something we ever thought we would do. However, the damage both Gove and Morgan have inflicted on the education system through their reforms and party politics was enough to convince us that it would be worth the sacrifices we would have to make, most notably the loss of a second salary and the financial restrictions that would bring with it. It is a privilege to watch our daughter grow and learn, to see her develop and to support her on this journey.
Our life’s path has always been off the beaten track, and while it is exhausting to swim against the stream, it is also very rewarding and fulfilling; we met many other like-minded families on the way.
The referendum
A decision with consequences as complex and far-reaching as whether or not the UK should remain a member of the EU is not something that should ever have been made the subject of an in/out referendum. Ever. The reason it took place was solely to prevent the conservatives party’s more extreme anti-EU backbenchers to join UKIP and thus to help Cameron cling on to power. Cameron was absolutely certain he would not lose this vote, catastrophically underestimating just how disconnected large parts of the country felt with Westminster. His arrogance, and I would argue negligence of his duties as prime minister to the UK at the time, was such that he didn’t even bother to make any plans ‘just in case’.
The ‘leave’ campaign was run on lies, distortions and exaggerations, and amidst open calls to disregard the input of experts, while the ‘remain’ campaign felt half-hearted and seemingly under constant attack from the media who dismissed it as fear-mongering when it tried to highlight the financial risks and uncertainties. Rational analysis and empirical data went out the window and in its place we were left with an extremely emotional debate.
As the battle lines were drawn I could feel the debate pulling on my very core, on my identity. I am a European citizen. Yes, the EU is in dire need of reform, but how can you be involved in this when you’re not part of it? Considering the multitude of challenges the world faces, in times when open communication, global collaboration and sustainable compromise are key, how can one country, a European country at that, put its own political power agenda above the common interest?
On the morning of the 24th of June I woke up to the news that the UK had voted to leave the EU. I burst into tears, my world shattered. It felt to me like the very principle under which I had come to the UK to study, live and work had been rejected by the British people. I felt rejected, in principle. Uninvited, not welcome any longer. Not by friends and family of course, there was an outpouring of support and love and even apologies on behalf of those who voted to remain, which was all much appreciated and welcome. But in amongst this was also the odd subtle racism that I wasn’t one of the immigrants they wanted to see off, I was a “good immigrant”, working, contribution to society, paying taxes and all that. Being German and having studied 1930s German history in school at great length this rang alarm bells which only got louder as the aftermath of the referendum unfolded.
For a short while I waited in vain for Cameron to thank the public for their valued input in this complex matter, and seeing that it was an advisory referendum (and yes, there was plenty talk about it being just that: advisory) the government would now contemplate how to move forward from here. I did not expect him to wash his hands of the mess he created and bow out of facing the consequences, whistling a merry tune. How was he permitted to walk away from this? How can there be no legal consequence to this level of professional negligence and incompetence? I remember the days and weeks that followed, being in a state of shock and watching in horror the political power grappling, the back stabbing, the denials, the back peddling, and with it came a rhetoric that further tore the country apart, dividing us into ‘winners’ and ‘losers’, brexiters and remainers.
”Brexit means Brexit”
When May eventually settled into her new role as prime minister the impact of the referendum result was already beginning to show with the falling value of the pound, a shrinking economy, an increase in hate crimes and rising fuel prices to name but a few. With the Labour party distracted by the leadership election, the conservative government was desperately trying to come up with a plan that would elaborate on ‘Brexit means Brexit’.
Even at that stage, after the dust of the political reorganisation had settled, I would have appreciated a simple: “Gosh, that was a bit unexpected and to be honest we didn’t prepare for this. Now, leaving the EU will have far-reaching consequences across all aspects of UK life and law, which will affect all citizens of the UK directly, including those living abroad, and it is a whole lot more complicated than we made it appear. However, we will try our best to hear you, the people, and translate your concerns and wishes into our policies. Please bear with us.”
Sadly that didn’t come to pass and instead what we got was the tory party conference with its divisive rhetoric. We learned that the conservative party would like UK businesses to keep lists of all foreign workers, that non-British NHS staff would be phased out or at least numbers reduced considerably by 2025, that ‘the youth’ will be picking fruit to battle unemployment, and that the UK’s new export items will be jam and tea because the world loves British food.
I read the news both in English and German, and I am absolutely appalled to see how facts are continually being mangled and misrepresented, misinterpreted and when all else fails simply made up to support the illusion that ‘Brexit means Brexit’, and what a fine Brexit it will be! A red, white and blue one, a successful one, best Brexit EVAR!
I find it infuriating and deeply insulting that I am presented with this cheerleading chant for a suicide mission by the government and am expected to join in. This from a government that was completely taken by surprise by the result, who had no plan whatsoever for how to make this happen, (other than wanting to have their cake and eat it, mind), and who — solely for the purpose of protecting their newly established power — peddled the illusion that this amazing Brexit would make Britain great again, a global Britain (while a citizen of the world is, as we know, a citizen of exactly nowhere) with better deals for the best conditions for trade, etc, etc.
All the while I can read on the other side of the channel that the EU is patiently waiting for the UK to make up their mind and declare their intention, reiterating the basic conditions of membership, i.e. access to single market = four freedoms. They also spent their time analysing the actual impact on their respective markets and adjusting budget forecasts accordingly. I have to this day not read a single piece of critical analysis, any data or commentary by an independent expert which would lead me to believe that Brexit is going to improve things for the people of this country. Not one.
A BBC radio commentary a few weeks ago hit the nail on the head with a piece highlighting the differences in language and attitude to politics and life in general between Germany and the UK when it explained that in Germany ‘no’ actually means ‘no’, while in the UK ‘no’ means ‘ask me until I say yes’. It also pointed out how Germany’s representative democracy means the country is often ruled by a coalition government, which requires a lot of discussion, negotiation and compromise, whereas the UK’s ‘first past the post’ system means there are ultimately only two parties in the race and they spend a lot of time on political posturing and point scoring. To me Corbyn, Lucas, Sturgeon and more recently also Clegg sound a lot more like politicians as I recognise them from German parliamentary meetings. They reason with facts, analyse data and look for common ground and compromise. Sadly their efforts seemingly go unnoticed.
Taking back control
In autumn 2016 the government’s refusal to give further details about the kind of Brexit they were planning left a vacuum that was quickly filled with rising concerns about the countries future as well as mine and that of 3.3 million other EU citizens, waiting to hear if they would be guaranteed the right to remain or not. Having been declared ‘bargaining chips’ to be used in the upcoming Brexit negotiations, people took matters into their own hands and started applying for Permanent Residency cards. Reports about rejected applications and Home Office form letters asking applicants to leave the UK filled the news, causing utter shock and devastation, leaving millions of EU-citizens in the UK and Brits living abroad in limbo.
The conservative government’s attitude towards us EU citizens as ‘bargaining chips’ is indicative of how they consider all and every aspect of the UK for its monetary value alone and have no qualms to sell it and barter with it. I wasn’t here in the 80s but I believe it was much the same. The tory government is asset stripping the country and just like it was 30 odd years ago it will have long-lasting devastating consequences for the communities affected by the loss of industry, employment opportunities and a knock on effect on small and medium local businesses. None of this is in the interest of the people. The relentless drive to continue the privatisation of essential services and industry will most of all benefit the political establishment and their business friends and financiers, and it will continue to erode the very substance of the British economy. There is barely anything left to trade with.
The divisive rhetoric used by the conservative government is doing nothing to bring people together, in fact the very way politicians conduct their every day business at Westminster, the insults, the chants and the point-scoring in parliament, are reflected in the way people respond to the referendum result with terms such as “winners” and “losers”. Reading the comments on the tweet with my BBC Question Time video clip confirms this, and until the government is prepared to admit its own failings here, chances of bringing people back together are very slim.
I am sick and tired of this. My life is not a bargaining chip for this twisted power poker game and I feel betrayed by the leaders of this country who ran a referendum campaign on “alternative facts” and “post truths”, reduced a decision with complex consequences to a binary choice, an advisory referendum at that, and then — out of fear for loosing power — proceeded to push this decision as “the will of the people”, stubbornly willing it into being, scrambling to come up with a plan and having the arrogance to pretend they could get a better deal, building a brighter future, having their cake and eating it. Despicable!
What has changed for me? Everything. I have fallen out of love with Britain over this and it no longer feels like home. These days when anyone asks me where I am from my heart sinks a little and I prepare myself for what might come. Gone are the days when we can talk about the German national football team’s superior penalty technique. Instead I find myself passionately defending Merkel’s immigration policy, an act of humanitarian duty for any country in the face of a humanitarian crisis. I take Merkel any day over May who stood by as 1000 children vanished after Calais was torn down, sold off into slavery, trafficked, abused or, if they were lucky, just freezing or starving to death as the UK government looked on.
When Nick Hewer and Sir Patrick Mcloughlin, both ‘remainers’, said we just have to get on with it, have a cry in the corner and accept the result it really pushed my buttons. For these two men I suspect nothing much will change in their relationship to their country or to Europe. They are both in positions of privilege and financial independence which the average UK citizen sadly is not. I know that my friends and their children will be deeply affected by the UK’s departure from the EU in many different aspects of their lives, and unlike me as EU-citizen, they do not have the option to ‘go back where they came from’. They are stuck.
For Cameron, Johnson, Gove, May, Farage and all the others to have given no regard to the people of this country, to those who voted to remain, to those who couldn’t vote at all, and then to have the nerve to call it “the will of the people” — that is the source of my anger and frustration and that is the reason I spoke up at Question Time.
