Deep down we hear an echo of who we really are. It’s not the one we’ve been pretending to be and its not the one we’re afraid we are. Until we start the journey back to who we really are we will continue to suffer.
The other day a client was sharing the confusion she remembers as a child. Adults arguing. She knew something felt wrong with this but she felt powerless to help or change things. As an adult this has manifested as “I’m not capable” and in over-mothering to compensate for her own believed lack of love from a mother in those moments in those early years.
And as life continued she saw grown ups and believed they had it sorted & that they knew what they were doing. Confusion. It doesn’t feel right. And yet they’re adults. They must. And I mustn’t. I must be wrong. I’m not good enough. I need to try harder, work harder, to be like them. To get to that place where I have it all sorted.
And so more suffering. An endless chase.
The world we’re born into is not the world we’re made from.
We’re made of love, peace, freedom, joy, creativity, curiosity, wholeness, security, integrity, connection to all things and every one.
Then we enter this world and immediately we’re labelled with a name. A limit put in place. A me created that is other to and distinct from a you. A first step of suffering. A first step away from who we really are.
In our very early years we have no idea of lack, broken-ness or incompleteness. Because by our very essence we are none of those things. But then the messages begin of “change this, improve that, don’t do that, this makes you worthy of love and attention but that doesn’t.” We begin to lose contact with the truth & get sucked into a story that we’re told by the world around us.
As we grow it continues, like for my client who knew as a child that we’re made of love, connection and integrity; arguing made no sense.
When we hold the gaze of a loved one, of a baby, of a dog. This feels entirely natural, it connects us, it feels grounding, it fills us with love. We see who we really are reflected back. It reminds us of our true nature which comes bubbling back to the surface of our awareness. A beacon back home.
But we’re told as kids not to stare. We’re essentially taught to not connect back to our true nature in one of the most powerful ways there are to connect. We’re taught not to be curious about others, when curious is an essential part of who we are. So we suffer.
And always a little voice is telling us there’s something not quite right. The voice of suffering, inviting us to look somewhere else to find what we need.
Society encourages us to look outside of ourselves. To food, alcohol, other people, drugs, work, stuff. We think we’ll soothe the voice there. We won’t. Sometimes we’ll keep trying that approach till the end of our days. Sometimes we’ll discover something else. The opportunity arises to soothe the voice with the truth and to go to the real source, back to who we really are. Dissolving the made-up separations and illusory broken-ness. Rediscovering our essence, our true nature. From there anything is possible. Everything we’ve been striving for becomes obvious, natural and easeful.
Reconnecting us to all the ways of being that the world needs right now: love, peace, freedom, joy, creativity, curiosity, wholeness, security, integrity, connection to all things and every one. All expressed through the uniqueness of a you.
[Image credit https://unsplash.com/@invent]