Recreational Sports League Social Skills Progress Report

Objectives:

DON’T RAMBLE. Keep it concise.

Don’t overthink this.

  • Did you have fun?
  • Did you meet new people?
  • Did you found out interesting stuff about people?
  • How have you gotten better (or worse) at this compared to your past?
  • How can you improve in the future?
  • Final observations

Answers:

  • Yes, absolutely. I had a lot of fun playing these new recreational sports.
  • Absolutely, they were mostly men but I was fine with that. I need to make male friends.
  • Yes, I learned about how one guy was from NYC and how he liked the city he’s in now better because it’s less hectic.
  • I definitely see progress. Not a lot but I’m trending in the right direction. I’m having fun, I’m more present, and I’m starting to introduce and engage people first (though not always). I’m still passive a bit and hold back from initiating small talk (probably out of unrealistic fear that I’ll be seen as hitting on someone and getting rejected and/or an unrealistic fear of seeming to eager to make a male friend or looking weird).
  • Push outside your comfort zone and fear a bit more. Accept the fear and do it anyways. See that you won’t die and celebrate those moments. Talk to more females, starting with ones you’re not too attracted to, introduce yourself, and ask a few questions about their life to find what’s interesting about them. You introduced yourself but you didn’t ask questions about others other than one to three.
  • 1) When I first introduced myself to two people, they responded unenthusiastically, didn’t ask me anything, and looked away. I reacted as if they didn’t like me and felt bad. Looking back, maybe I was overreacting. Maybe they were just shy (or maybe not). One of them asked me if I knew where I was supposed to go to sign in and pointed me to the right direction, which was friendly. 2) At the end, I talked to a group of them, they started small talking about how they liked that people showed up for once and would like to play again, I chimed in meekly that I would like to play again, then, they started talking on their own and their backs started turning away from me. I was mad they seemed to be excluding me, but I didn’t chime up or speak. I felt it was unnecessary for me to speak up for them to at least notice my presence and include me. But maybe that’s a bit narcissistic. I’m an average guy, not a superstar. I should have contributed a bit more to the conversation so they noticed me at the very least. Definitely some childhood trauma associated with being left out of groups that I still hold with me that is affecting my behavior. My natural reaction was to just let them exclude me.