The Best Self Help Tips of 2017 Have Nothing To Do With Generic Goal-Setting or Attitude

Out of all the thousands of hours of self help advice I’ve crammed in my head recently, what’s been the most useful isn’t the popular stuff.

Instead, it was a few small points from a dating podcast (of all things) called The Mating Grounds.

They made me analyze my behavior around others and really root out any weird psychological blocks that were holding me back. Rather than focus on tactical tips like “Top 10 Pick Up Lines”, they dove deep. They argued the problem was deeper than that.

So far, I’ve unearthed some interesting behaviors that I’ve been working on. It’s made me a much better person and less of a weirdo.

For example, not longer, I got outraged when I joined a fitness demo class late and no one at the gym bothered to ask me for help or guide me to the right place. Everyone was staring at me, but no one helped. That’s bizarre behavior when you think about it. I just assumed everyone was evil when maybe they just didn’t know.

When I dig into this issue (something they recommended rather than run away from it or try to forget it), I think the cause was unjustified entitlement (and possibly childhood moments of feeling left out). This plus my inclination to jump to conclusions caused a subtle bizarre behavior that manifested in other ways in my life. I may feel snubbed in social situations when it was simply a neutral interaction.

Since then, I have made some effort to be slower to rage. I have also tried to not jump to conclusions and try to understand people from other’s perspectives. People I assume are giving me the cold shoulder turn out not to be when I engage with them. It hasn’t dramatically changed my life, but I’m slowly and steadily making progress towards being a better person.