The Woman Who Gave Birth to My Daughters is Not Their Mother
The woman who gave birth to my twin daughters is a lot of things, but she is not their mother.
She is the woman who carried my baby girls in her womb and nurtured them when I could not. She is incredibly generous, kind, thoughtful, caring, and compassionate beyond measure. She is a woman with whom I am intimately bonded through the experience of giving my daughters life. She is now a treasured friend.
But, she is not my daughters’ mother.
If you ask her, she’d say the same. If you ask that question of any gestational surrogate, you’d get the same answer.
Gestational surrogates are not the mothers of the babies they carry in their wombs; they are not the mothers of the children they give birth to for the sake of the intended parents. What they do is a unique act which creates a unique relationship.
A gestational surrogate does not have any genetic or biological connection to the pregnancy she carries. An embryo created by two other people is placed in her womb to be given a chance at life. Sometimes the embryo is biologically the child of the intended parents. Sometimes one…
