I am not the kind of girl that goes from one relationship to another. I know that when something ends you need time to evaluate and think and find your center. This time I broke that personal rule. I lined up a replacement. I tested the waters with the new guy… let’s call him Carl. My friends told me a few things about Carl and encouraged me to move in that direction. So I said goodbye to Brad. (Brad who had been through everything together with me. I loved Brad.)

Carl and I started out slow but when I focused my full attention on him he erased my memory of Brad completely. The problem — Carl’s flaws popped up a lot faster than I was prepared for. He literally made me vomit, and I don’t even want to discuss the rash.

You know how it is with breakups. After a little time has passed, things in your memory are always better than real life. Last night I needed Brad. All of my thoughts were swirling with the possibility of letting people down, and the shame of having anyone know I chose wrong, or that I was going backwards.

I went and picked Brad up. 10 minutes- may less -with him and I remembered why I left him behind. I’m done with Brad, but don’t judge me if occasionally I want to revisit his scent.

I dumped Carl and am going to pretend he never happened.

So like always I’m just going to hang out with my fantastic friends to get through this. They distract me, and refocus me and need nothing from me.

Does this sound familiar? Here’s the thing:

Brad is a pack of Camel Menthol Silver

Carl is Chantix (aka the Devil)

My friends are Walgreen’s Brand Nicotine Gum.

Thank God for my friends!!

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