Loneliness is my carnival

11pm, 12pm, 1am, 2am….

There’s less and less light when I see London through my window.

Everything seems never changed after I left Leietser, but everything seems so different at the same time.

I am like a Paranoia whose life full of paradox. Feeling lost, but still walking forward.

Sometimes I want to be a man who is contented and happy, but I still desired to escape from the imprisonment of old routines. I enjoyed my inner world.

Stand in front of the mirror, staring at this man. I know I want to find out what is controlling him in his mind.

I know that, I know nothing. — — Socrates

Socrates said that he never thought that he knew something, which he actually did not know.

Just like me, I know who is this guy in the mirror, but there is always a sound in my mind that keep telling me, and push me to explore myself. Disconnected is never a bad thing for me.

Life is always a journey to be experienced, and for me, I chose a way to explore it by myself, in most cases.

Suddenly everything in this world starts to matters with me. I started to walk at night on an empty street, I started to try new thing around me. Even a drop of someone’s blood that I found on the street could inspire me the precious meaning of my life. The more afraid you are of death, the less you’ll be able to enjoy life.

You can never find truths on the surface. It isn’t until you look a bit deeper, beneath the surface contradictions, that the real grains of wisdom emerge. The more you learn, the more you realize how little you know.

Enjoy the lonely, figure out who you are and always get already to be inspired and then create your own carnival to celebrate your life.