What To Do When You Just Can’t Say No
“I have been accused of never saying no.”
– William Shatner
Do you often find yourself being completely swamped, yet when someone asks you for help you still go “Why of course I can!”?
Then you should examine why you’re having a hard time saying “no”.
Are you afraid of upsetting people? Is it some habit you formed during your childhood? Understanding and dealing with the underlying issue is key.
Sure, there are plenty of folks looking to take advantage of people who just can’t say no, but then there are those who actually need and appreciate our help. Let’s make sure to not call everyone who asks for help an “opportunists”.
The best thing you could do is to rehearse several different scenarios either by yourself or with a friend. That way you’ll develop another reaction than the instinctive one you’ve got right now.
Another technique is to form the habit of pausing for at least 3–5 seconds and really thinking before giving an answer. Often we feel pressured or stressed to come up with an answer.
That’s why we immediately grasp the first and easiest solution, which in your case is to say “yes”. For others “no” comes more naturally, and that can also have negative consequences. For example, they could miss out on amazing opportunities.
What we all need to do is to give ourselves time to evaluate what we really want to do.
What do you have a really hard time saying no or yes to?
Have a kick-ass ₢eative day!