3 Zodiac Signs Virgos Should Avoid Sleeping With For Their Own Sanity
You’ll do yourself a lot of good if you take some notes from here.
If you know a bit about the kind of content I write, I take the piss out of Zodiacs a lot. But that doesn’t mean that I’m sceptical on the Sun Signs.
After my first post about how my Star Sign, Virgo, was wrong about my sex life, quite a few realisations happened. You would be able to see those realisations through my latest Zodiac blog post.
I wanted to turn away from the idea that I would only be able to have a happy, healthy love/sex life if I hook up with someone who’s Star Sign is compatible with mine. If I don’t hook up with the most harmonious person for me, then I have to create a plan to make that guy warm up to me. Yeah…what was I thinking?
As I was turning away, denouncing every Elle and Cosmopolitan magazine that I’ve read when I was 14 years old felt strangely satisfying. And shoving the middle finger up at the constellations while shouting ‘Fuck you, Orion.’ felt unusually good.
That was until one recent breakup brought me to a stop sign on the road. After more than 7 months of abstinence, I took advantage of the time I spent alone, and accumulated all the men that I’ve been with to see which Zodiacs I should avoid, just to keep my sanity intact.
If there’s one thing that puts you two at different ends of the scale, it would be stability. You’re practical and hard to distract, whereas Sagittarius wants to explore, and would bring far more spanking pads and butt plugs that you could handle.
Since you are an Earth Sign and Sagittarius is a Fire Sign, you two would always be stalling until one of you would give out. Your partner would want to go balls-blazing, but you’d hold back and think:
‘Hang on, what are the chances of me catching an STI if I do THAT to you?’.
The fire is going to burn your soil, Virgo.
I’ve always had mixed emotions on how realistic star signs, astrology, and horoscopes are, but there are certain events that occur and make me think:
‘Hmm, are the stars true to me? Are they actually telling me that you’re an asshole?’
At the beginning, sex with a Pisces is amazing. It’s not as fiery as it would be with a Sagittarius, but it’s still playful, so you get to have your dick or your clit tickled, at least.
However, too much playfulness can become a bad thing, and you may end up with a giant bruise on your ass one night. It happened to me before, so trust me…
You’d get the same realisation that Rachel had about Todd on her 30th Birthday, and ghosting Pisces may be the best option to take when you don’t want freaky with them anymore.
When you go to bed with a Gemini, you feel like you’re in a threesome. Why? Because you’re opening your legs for 2 people. 2 different people in the same body, mind you.
After sex, you spend more time analysing the different personalities than going for round 2. Gemini doesn’t waste time on wishy-washy thinking, Virgo. After all, they fall under the Air Sign.
And just like with Pisces, you’ll get tired of their shit, and how aloof and attached they can be. There are some nights where you’re making love to Dr. Jekyll, and other nights where you’re getting ravaged by Mr. Hyde.
You can only handle 1 personality at a time, so there will be a moment where you want to split your body in 2, just to satisfy Gemini.