I’m Still Single Because I Don’t Want to Marry an Asshole
Ezinne Ukoha

I have blessedly reached the age where everyone has given up on me getting married. I got them to stop asking before I hit my forties, but that’s because of a strategic use of tirades and a long history of bad relationships. No one expects a miracle from me anymore because that would mean that I had changed and I have not changed in a very long time. I am way more “me” now than I have ever been before and that person is really, really bad at interacting consistently with other people.

Recently my mother asked if I regretted not having children because, aren’t they so sweet and I had to remind her who she was talking to. This is your daughter who HATED being a child herself. At this late date, did you expect a switch to flip and an urge that never existed to suddenly come to life? That’s a bad bet.

I stand in solidarity with you. Your life will not, in fact, be lesser if you never get married. It’s better to be alone than it is to constantly wish that you were!

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