A Reflection, of a reflection.
I am graduating from college in 3 weeks.
Thus, my life is going to completely change, and an entirely new chapter of my life will begin. I am honestly really unsure how I feel about the entire thing. Not only have I evolved as a person, but the entire world around me also has too. Obvious things such as a global pandemic altered everyone’s lives, but specifically my college experience. And I, much like the rest of the planet, am resentful about that. On the surface, I lost 2 years of college, as well as all of the experiences that come along with those years. But I think the thing I am most resentful of, is how it changed me.
I have a totally different outlook on life now. And it is not always in a positive light. For the most part, it is the exact opposite of positive. No one asked to be a part of a debilitating, tumultuous thing such as a pandemic. But damn, has it sucked. In all of this utter bullshit, I think the positivity will hopefully come later..? Like maybe I will seize every moment, or live every day like it’s my last. But, in reality, I feel like it will just continue to push my life back a couple of years. Which I am not entirely mad at. There are things I absolutely need to do within the next 10 years, or just before I die, whichever comes first.
- Live abroad- I was going to study abroad the summer after the pandemic hit… I think if I go, I will never come back. Exciting stuff.
2. Get my mental health under control- self-explanatory.
3. Buy myself my first designer bag- which to some seems dumb, but this is my life.
4. Be completely financially independent- also self-explanatory.
5. Have a successful, fulfilling career- unsure what this means yet?
6. Get a hobby- this may sound strange, but I cannot just smoke weed and sit on the couch for the rest of my life (sad).
7. Read more- find the time and the books to stimulate this bored brain.
I am sure there are a million other things I want to do and probably should do, but for now, this is where I’m at. But, I will miss my biggest stressor in the world being a paper, a test, or what I will be wearing come Thursday night. I will miss the simplicity of college, and anytime before that. Because in 3 weeks from now, when I have to start my life. I will miss the most, complaining about my outfit, my assignments, and my roommates. I wish maybe I were more nostalgic about this whole ordeal. And I probably will be one day soon, when I am sitting in my childhood bedroom, aimlessly applying for jobs trying to figure out the rest of my existence. But for now, I am just one bitter 22-year-old.