sleeplessness

I could tell you how today, I decided to let the glass walls down

The wind streamed through the windows I opened

Sometimes a soft susurrus, child-like wave playing at my ears

Sometimes a screaming torrent whipping my hair around me

Leaving unfamiliar notes clinging to my strands

I could tell you I have let my guard down and allowed myself

To be friends with sunshine again

The warmth felt cozy, like the walls of my childhood home

I could curl up in my own patch of melting butter like sunniness

At peace with a world that takes it for granted

I could tell you my late night trysts with moonbeams has made me part silver

That the blood in my veins is speckled with moon dust

The lead is leached out and I find a new lightness in its place

A serenity that only stars posses, just as beautiful, just as distant

I could. I could. I could.

But then, I never did learn how to hold someone’s heart in my hands

Having carved it out of their chest myself.

~ as ~