Reviewing What I learned From “The subtle art of not giving a fuck “
- A counter-intuitive approach to living a good life.
Although, I am not much of a book reader, but I am believer of appreciating anything that is good, something that provides you a perspective and effects your thinking pattern. The entire human race is trying to live a better and happier life, irrespective of they know that or not, this book, if taken seriously, is an eye opener, it makes you rethink and adjust your ideologies, we will discuss few important take-a-ways from book.
You are not special
So is no one else, everybody in their life at some stage think of themselves as someone special, we think we deserve special treatment for x,y or z reason, may be for being victim of something or may be for being superior than someone, we are constantly focusing on getting attention, we post on social media and expect comments and likes, because we want attention, because we want to feel better about ourselves by getting someone else consensus, entitlement is injurious to mantle health.
The point is, every individual is a different story, everyone has different kind of pain, though being different to everyone makes you special as in one in billions, but since this is so common, that each one in billions is different, no one is special, the different is not special, it is common phenomenon.
Well, everyone as a child starts to like batman, superman, flash and other super heroes, but all my life, I have felt physically ugly, which eventually, transformed into feeling of hatred towards beautiful looking people, that led me to avoid crowd, all of this made me think about the world in which we can see how people look from inside their soul and heart, the disappointment panda is the hero that I always wanted, because the idea is that, he will tell people the reality and truths that they avoid, ignore and keep themselves oblivion from, the book says, the panda will come to you and say things like, “Sure, making a lot of money makes you feel good, but it won’t make your kids love you.” or “If you have to ask yourself if you trust your wife, then you probably don’t” or “What you consider ‘friendship’ is really just your constant attempts to impress people.” or “screw you” well not the last one :D.
The disappointment panda is not the hero we want but the hero we need, he is the main source of harsh realities, truths and pain of life, he is the mirror that every person needs for the sake of self acceptance and progress.
The writer beautifully describes how we avoid taking responsibility, and how it affects our life, he makes very good points regarding this matter, he suggest to take control, he says, it is possible that you are not to be blamed for anything that happened to you, but you are definitely responsible for how you react and feel about it.
Mark Manson points out one very important aspect of life related to taking responsibilities, that is your values, values is all it is about, if you have shitty values, that is the matrix on which you evaluate your life, your happiness, and your success, then life is so gonna suck, to live better, to achieve more success, you need to define better matrix on which you will eventually evaluate life matters, he gives example of a man he knew who had short height delusion and how he thought that he had no choice as all women want is tall guys, mark suggest that how he had taken one variable and focused on it, how he could improve and change his shitty values like, I will wait for someone who is understanding, respecting and cares more about what person I am, but no, he didn’t took responsibility, as a result his happiness was in hands of other peoples mindset, which is of course disaster.
Mark’s most points revolve around idea’s and dilemma’s that we carry, that we keep fixating on, he says it is basically avoiding responsibility, that we do not select better values and only complain about things, since with great responsibility comes requirement of actions, as it is kind of chain reaction.
You accept the truth, then realize where problem lies, which leads to change your values, then you have to take actions for that, but most people are even not able to clear step one, that is acceptance. The writer talks about self-awareness, and suggests it is like a onion, it has many layers, and deeper you get, more you wanna cry, but it is very important to unfold, because whatever is inside, it will contribute to your values.
This part of review is called, conclusion, well, we all will live and die, the only thing that matters is how you lived when you were awake, we don’t need to be special, rich, good looking, smart, or anything else, we just need to be satisfied with our current scenarios and keep moving, and have better values that give us control over our own life.
Thanks for reading, comment and let me know what you think and if you have already read it, I am open to discuss any ideas.