A Letter To My Future Son
I don’t know you quite yet. At age 22, I’m but a young man myself. Green, for sure, not too old with all the grey hairs, or a baldhead, but my more than two decades on this planet has taught me a few lessons, which I’d like to share with you. You see, son, there are some mistakes I made in life growing up as a kid which I wouldn’t want to fall prey to — I’d fail as a father if I let you.
It’s in view of this that I write you this. Don’t get it wrong, don’t think after reading this, you won’t face any problems in life, or your life will be a perfect one. But there’s one thing I can assure you of; that your life will be much better than mine.
Know that whatever religion you choose to follow, always know that there’s only One and Greater GOD, who’s the creator of the universe. The One whose name is above all names. You can’t outsmart this Man — He knows it all. He sees it all. And He hears it all. He made you out of mere clay and it’s by his breath that you’re able to read this. Be faithful to Him and obey His commandments. I’m your earthly father, but He is your eternal father.
Life Is Not Fair
Son, this life that you’ll soon come to meet is full of mysteries. When you’re born you cry and people laugh. But when you die, you smile and people cry. It’s a crazy world. People preach virtue but will slander you with all the strength they have so you practice otherwise. They will say, be confident, but when you’re confident of yourself/what you know, they will say you’re “too known” or so full of yourself. But, you see, that’s the society we live in.
Don’t be intimidated by this, go on, say all you know, ask all the crazy questions, be so hardworking till they call you “busy body” for at the end of the day, when you retire to bed, it’s just you, with your thoughts and you wouldn’t want to regret the opportunities you had but didn’t take because people tried to talk to out of it. People will always talk, either for the good or the bad. So why don’t you do what you think is best for you? Because if you listen to what men always have to say, you might fail to listen to that inner voice that seems to be the real you. Don’t drown your voice surrounding yourself by that of people. Be different son. Dare to be different. People who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are those who actually do.
Son, make sure that in all the years you spend on this earth, you never look down on anyone. People are not shoelaces to be looked down upon. Treat all men equally and fairly. The respect you’ll have for the CEO should be the same respect you have for the security guard, cleaner, or errands boy.
You see, this is life; not everyone will get the opportunity to be at the top but those you see at the bottom also once had dreams or still have dreams of being at the top. Despising the person will not make you any better. Rather, love and respect them. You can make someone else’s life better just by a single act of love.
The Proverbs 31 Woman
Make sure, my son, to find a woman who can manage your life/help you achieve your dreams. Because, son, a man’s success has a lot to do with the kind of woman he chooses to have in his life. I really don’t mind at what age you decide to date, as far as you keep your morality intact and are faithful to your God. The greatest mistake you can make in your lifetime is to marry a troublesome woman. She’ll send you to your grave before your time. A woman can make or break you depending on whom she is. Be wise with your decision about whom you’d choose as a partner to spend the rest of your life with. They say the wedding ring is the smallest handcuff, be careful who you choose to spend your lifetime jail sentence with. When in doubt, read Proverbs 31:10–31 to guide you.
It’s 2 am in the morning, cold and lonely down here and I’m up writing to you. You might want to ask where your mum is. Well your mum is somewhere fighting so hard to be a good mother to you and a good wife to your dad. We’ve decided not to meet till we’re both ready for what meeting as love couples have in stock for us. The truth really is, we’re not ready for you now. No, that doesn’t mean we don’t want you, it’s just that we want the very best of life for you, and we can’t get that life for you at this time. Anyway, I’ll update you if I find your mum, which I plan to do soon. I hope that makes you smile.
School Is Not Success
You see, son, most of the things you’ll need to face life are really not taught in school, so subject yourself to constant, continuous learning. Education is good but constant learning is key. Read all you can. Know all you can. That’s the only weapon you can face the uncertainties of life with. I wouldn’t say school has failed us, but you’ll fail yourself heavily if you depend on school to teach you what you need to face life. This is reality son; the most difficult lessons in life are learnt independently, most often the hard way. So brace yourself, and be prepared to face life’s battle.
Son, I’m not going to ask you at a younger age what career path you’d like to choose. Because I know so well that, as you grow, you begin to discover your strength and me forcing you to tell what you’d want to be when you grow, at that young age will only limit your thinking capacity and creativity. Just know that I’ll support you all the way through. After all, those who really change the world are not those who chose and stuck to a career path, but those who discovered their true self.
Your Friends Are Your Worth
Know this son, that no man is an island. You need company, association, and friends. In as much as you need to make friends, you need to make good, quality friends. Friends that will add value to your life.
Don’t be deceived, bad company corrupts good mind. Whatever goal you’ve set to achieve will be fulfilled depending on the friends you keep. The less you associate with some people, the more your life will improve. Any time you tolerate mediocrity in others, it increases your mediocrity too. An important attribute in successful people is their impatience with negative thinking and negative acting people. As you grow, your associates will change. Some of your friends will not want you to go on. They will want you to stay where they are. Friends that don’t help you climb will want you to crawl. Your friends will stretch your vision or choke your dream. Those that don’t increase you will eventually decrease you.
Don’t follow anyone who is not going anywhere. With some people you spend some evening: with others you invest in. Be careful where you stop to inquire for directions along the road of life. Wise is the person who fortifies his life with the right friendships. If you run with wolves, you will learn how to howl, but if you associate with eagles you will learn how to soar to greater heights. A mirror reflects a man’s face, but what he is really is shown by the kind of friends he chooses. The simple but true fact of life is that you become like those with whom you closely associate — for the good and the bad.
Son, just so you know, I’m working so hard to secure a brighter future for you. A life free from hunger and financial troubles, so that when you’re planning your life, you don’t focus so much on just the basic needs, rather think of the bigger and brighter picture, how to make a significant change in this world. I’m telling you this because I want you to know that there’s more to life than just what you will eat, drink and wear.
Son, if you’ll forget anything I’ve said so far, please keep these in your heart, it will help shape the course of your life. Don’t be a lazy man; whatever you find yourself doing, do it with all diligence.
Don’t be timid; be courageous and bold. Don’t be average or mediocre; strive for excellence in all you do. Be a man of integrity, be honest in all your dealings. Stay humble. Love and respect everyone. Bear in mind that, confidence isn’t pride, and humility isn’t timidity. Be humble but confident. Your grandpa, who happens to be my dad, said to me once; “Sammy, know that whatever you’d want to do is possible, but the consequences of it is what matters. Will you look back at your decision and smile or look back and cry with regret? Think about it.”
It’s almost 3am son and I have a busy day tomorrow. I’d like to end here, and hopefully write to you again soon. I’ll keep in touch. Hope to see you soon, maybe not too soon, but soon.