thirty-8 weeks

abeni doula
Jul 25, 2017 · 2 min read

I already acknowledged that it is 38 weeks when I wrote last Tuesday. I wrote on Tuesday for the first time in many months. I guess that exhausted my powers because it has taken me almost an entire week to get back to writing.

Speaking of exhausted…I am tired as hell and I’ve been getting plenty of sleep.

this is what my writing feels like with no foundation

Summer is winding down, not because it is ending, but the school year will be beginning again and it is yet another reminder. Last summer was filled with magic and I still have yet to write about 90% of it. It is the foundation of my writing and I have somehow managed to build in its absence. The love part of this love/Love story…most of it remains untold. It is evident, surely, but un-chronicled. I desperately wanted to write about it, in order, but I’m thinking that maybe I should take a page of of E. Scott Alighieri’s book and let it flow.

I intended to write about each part of it as the one year marks approached. But they came so fast…every day, every week, every month. Nine months of grieving while watching the same months as last year fly right by in disbelief. Only 12 months ago I was floating in the heavens.

Tomorrow, I’ll at least start from the very beginning, and see where that leads me. I don’t want my summer to pass me by without committing my memories to writing. Maybe I can start to feel again once I let it go/come.

abeni doula

Written by

I am hurting like hell over the sudden, tragic loss of a Man who had given me so much Life in recent months.

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