Why I’m still Christian
It still feels weird to say, but years ago I realized I thought the evidence against God was stronger than the evidence for God. I interrogated where my beliefs were coming from, and found that I found non-theistic explanations of the universe more compelling than theistic ones, and that my belief in God was mostly supported by my emotional commitment to my wife and my past. It was uncomfortable, and then I decided to go on believing in God anyway.
This isn’t an issue of faith over reason. I think treating faith as something that could replace or conquer reason is misusing a very important virtue. I may not feel my position is the one with the best support, but I do think it’s highly plausible.
No, this is about what drives me. I fundamentally believe that God is a God of love. The heart of my theology is ‘God is love.’ And since God created the universe, that means the heart of the universe is love too. That’s really important for me. It gives my life direction and allows me to stand up and keep facing all the things in my life that are not love. It let’s me say with MLK the arc of moral universe bends towards justice, and it lets me face oppressors and say with Desmond Tutu ‘Join the winning side.’
I am made for love, and to be love, and to bring love into the world. I use my reason to decide what’s right and wrong and my faith to live up to it. Christianity may not be true, but it is at least plausible enough to make me a better person. And for me, that is enough.