Apparently I Wrote a Book
I woke up this morning and saw a headline titled “50 Challenges You Can Start Today.”
I wonder what sort of person reads that and goes “HELL YES, MOTHERFUCKER! Bring it ON!” I know those people exist. I am not one of them. The fact that I have to work today AND pick up kids from school AND go to CVS AND cook dinner so people can leave early for evening activities AND go get some straggling crap out of my old house is plenty for me, thanks.
Last night I dreamed that a horse fell on me. It was a massive horse, big as an elephant. As the animal was falling and I was watching its rounded center come down on me, I thought “This could kill me. Can anyone lift a horse this big? I don’t think so. This could kill me. But no. I decide that it’s not going to. I’m getting out of this.”
The hippie dippy part of me decided this was a symbol for overwhelm. The last few weeks have been nonstop, and I got some news yesterday that mean the next few weeks are likely to get even crazier. And yesterday, it’s true, I did make the decision that these next few weeks would not kill me. I would rise above. So maybe my subconscious was assuring me.
Or maybe I’ve been thinking about the circus a lot over the last few days (see previous post) and that means horses and elephants and maybe I also read a news article the other day about a trophy hunter in Africa who was killed when an elephant fell on him. His buddy shot the elephant to stop it from attacking. Boom, over it went. Right onto the hunter. Talk about karma.
And also, maybe I took Somnis last night because I wanted to have deep and wonderful sleep and Somnis tends to give me intense dreams.
Or maybe it means all of those things. Because, as I recently read, the only meaning that life has is the meaning we give it.
Deep, huh? Me likey.
About that book I mentioned …
Not to bury the bury the lede here, but I wrote a book. It’s called You’re Only Getting Older and Uglier — Start Online Dating NOW: The single mom’s guide to getting back out there.
How’s that for a title stuffed fulla keywords? I figure there’s probably a lot of people searching for how to be older and uglier.
I released it on Amazon last week, one week after I moved, surrounded by boxes in a weird, old house and work, work, work and a bunch of other stuff going on. It wasn’t my plan to release it then, but sometimes life tells you when it’s time.
Or does it? Because remember, life only has the meaning that we give it. I choose to believe that life was like, “Hey … didn’t you finish that book months ago? I think you did. Time to get it out there, babe. NOW.”