Fast Facts About Corinne from The Bachelor, By Someone Who Doesn’t Watch The Bachelor

  1. Corrinne is on this season of The Bachelor.
  2. Corinne is not liked, I’m guessing?
  3. Corene is still on the show or has been eliminated in the past few weeks.
  4. Correine likes drama, I bet.
  5. Corine probably isn’t lactose intolerant, judging by this Google Image search.
  6. Correne enjoys Italian food.
  7. Corine spends a lot of time in wedding dresses.
  8. Did Corinine win already? What’s up with all these wedding dresses?
  9. Coriene’s boobs are coming up a lot on this Google Image search.
  10. Corrinne is Kellyanne Conway… wait, no.
  11. Corinnie ate a rose?
  12. So, Nick is The Bachelor
  13. Like, still?
  14. He’s been on this show a lot.
  15. I think he’s from Milwaukee, but I’d bet you $5 he lives in California now.
  16. Coreine stole a candelabra from the mansion.
  17. Fine, I know Nick is from Milwaukee because I watched The Bachelorette.
  18. He probably has a body guard. He’d have to, right?
  19. Do you think he’s putting money away in a 401(k)?
  20. Carrine likes swimming in the pool — oh, wow, okay.
  21. Like, career-wise, I wonder where Nick thinks he’s going from here.
  22. Should I be putting money in a 401(k)?
  23. Dad, if you’re reading this, assume I’m putting money in a 401(k).
  24. Coorine doesn’t have a 401(k) either, so.
  25. I am Cooranne.