20 Characters Who NEED to be in ‘Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness’
The internet has reached new levels of exhausting. Now the MCU has introduced the idea of the multiverse, and this is going to be a primary focus of the upcoming Doctor Strange sequel, people are obsessed with proposing terrible ideas for characters who should cameo. It’s always either one of two things:
- Characters/ actors you feel vaguely nostalgic about - Hugh Jackman as Wolverine. Nicolas Cage as Ghost Rider. Chris Evans as The Human Torch. Name a character who would be an easy crowd-pleaser, and fans are screaming for them to lazily step through a portal for an underwhelming “surprise.” Before long the portals will become the MCU’s giant eagles.
- Actors, either new or previously in the MCU, featuring as variants - Tom Cruise is currently rumoured as a variant of Iron Man, John Krasinski is still rumoured to be a variant of Mister Fantastic, and Chris Evans will apparently pick up a new shield as Captain Hydra. Again, all obvious choices very lazily selected.
Bearing in mind, these aren’t just theories, these are supposed “leaks” too. I’ve seen leaks for Ghost Rider, the previous Fantastic Four casts, and just today I’ve seen a leak supposedly confirming an appearance from every X-Men character you can think of, from both generations. Basically if someone has featured in any Marvel project under any production company in the last twenty five years, they’re guaranteed to feature in this film, because Twitter has declared it so. Suffice to say, it is too much.
I’ve abandoned any notion of this film being just a Doctor Strange film, and I’m embracing the fact this MUST be as extra as possible. The theories have been absolutely absurd. People seem to be name dropping any Marvel character as a potential cameo, despite the fact it wouldn’t serve the film beyond being a cheap thrill, and in some cases the actors have absolutely no interest in reprising their role. But that doesn’t matter! The film must feature anyone and everyone. We’re looking at a Marvel themed Jackson Pollock painting, a mutlicoloured mix of splodges hurling themselves into each other. Some would say it’s a mess, others would say it’s genius, I would argue it is in fact both.
So I’m here to do things properly. I don’t want the multiverse of mediocrity, I want the multiverse of MADNESS we’ve all been promised. If we’re going weird and supposedly making one of the bravest films ever, then commit to the assignment. If you think there’s too many rumours and theories, consider the words of Alan Partridge:
“That’s one way of looking at it. Another way of looking at it is: people like them, let’s make some more of them.”
The task I’ve set myself is to blow everyone’s minds with another list of characters who NEED to cameo in the upcoming Doctor Strange film. Forget your Chris Evans and your quirky little Tom Cruise variant of Tony Stark which feels like an SNL skit one person found funny. We’re going through a list of characters we all want to see in this film but are perhaps too scared to admit it. There’s no room for half measures here. Because let’s face it, if we’re talking about the whole multiverse, a literal infinite number of possibilities, and the most creative cameo you can come up with is Hugh Jackman as Wolverine, then you’re doing this wrong. To borrow from Tom Hardy’s character in Inception:
“You mustn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.”
Are we all ready? Of course not. No one is ready.
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1. Taika Waititi as Korg
Let’s start off nice and easy. This is the character we want to see in all Marvel films moving forwards. This is the new Stan Lee cameo, the universe’s most friendly rock creature, with a gentle New Zealand accent.
2. Seth Green as Howard the Duck
This is an obvious joke, let’s move on.
3. Ben Affleck as Daredevil
Yes, this should happen. If the multiverse is happening then literally everything comes with it, not just Wolverine and any other characters you deem to be “cool.” This is the other annoying side of the speculation trend, I’ve noticed people are only cherry picking through the projects they deem to be worthy of a nostalgia boost. I know most schools will have embraced the idea of selective history teaching, but we’re not doing that here. Daredevil (2003) happened folks, and we should all be reminded of that.
4. Nicholas Hammond as the 70s Spider-Man
Okay, so now we can all admit Sony played it safe with the cameo choices in No Way Home, this is a second change to get it right. You can’t open the doors to the Spider-Verse and not include the guy who wore the suit before anybody else. I want to see Friedrich from The Sound of Music return to his second most iconic role, scaling the side of a wall whilst obviously being hoisted by a visible wire.
5. All of the Inhumans
Had you forgotten about this little skeleton in the closet? The project which was once a jewel in the crown when Phase Three was announced. Then when the Inhumans series flopped, Marvel tried to dispose of the body and hoped none of us would notice or remember. Well we did. This has been like an early episode of Breaking Bad. Disney and Marvel Studios would like to think the body was gone, when actually it’s just been upstairs dissolving in a bath tub full of acid. This film will hopefully be the moment the bathroom floor caves in and displays the corpse for all to see.
Again, we can’t teach selective history or be picky about nostalgia, this is the multiverse, no one ever said it had to be cool.
6. Joel McHale as the bank clerk from ‘Spider-Man 2’
If Doctor Octopus and Tobey Maguire returned, its not really a Spider-Man 2 reunion party without this guy, right? He was the highlight of the film! A bigger villain than Doc Ock because he wouldn’t hep Aunt May with her financial problems!
7. Owen Wilson as Lightning McQueen
Why limit ourselves to just human characters? This is the whole multiverse we’re talking about. It would be a crime if Disney didn’t use this opportunity to give the people what they want.
8. Ian McDiarmid as Emperor Palpatine
What? He’s back? Again?! Nooooooooooooooooooooooo!
9. Ryan Reynolds as Green Lantern
I can already hear the cynics saying “you’ve got it wrong, he’s DC!”, and I’m fully aware of this. To those people I ask a very simple question: what’s the problem? If this film is supposedly going to bust open the doors of the multiverse and show us things we’ve never seen before, then why is Green Lantern a step too far? What, are your petty Disney gods only able to use characters they actually own? Pathetic.
10. Tony the Tiger
Come on, you’re not about to have a punch-up without this neckerchief wearing lunatic. Tony Stark can officially step to the side.
Interestingly, I did Google this character for the sake of the article, and it would appear Tony briefly came under fire for accusations of being culturally insensitive, along with several other cartoon characters. So Disney will have absolutely no problem putting them in this film, as long as there’s a half-hearted disclaimer before it plays on Disney Plus, we’re in business.
11. The surviving Ghostbusters
This film is looking pretty spooky, right? Almost too spooky. And when there’s something STRANGE in your neighbourhood, we all know who to call. Sounds like a job for Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd and Ernie Hudson.
12. Sylvester Stallone as both Rocky and Rambo
Now we’re getting brave. Don’t even think of hitting me with the argument of “but Stallone is already in the MCU!” because this is what people want. Remember, multiverse of MADNESS, not multiverse of playing it safe. People love variants now after watching Loki, so this will keep us all happy.
13. Michael Keaton as Batman
Again, sticking to the same property is too easy. DC are bringing back Michael Keaton as Batman, surely Marvel can at least match such a big move, right?
14. Eminem as B-Rabbit from ‘8 Mile’
Have you guys not seen the leak about the rap battle that happens at the end of this film? Catch up. History is being made over here.
15. Terrence Howard as Rhodey/ War Machine
This one isn’t a joke. This is a sincere wish the actor reprises their role from Iron Man (2008), and Marvel pay him properly this time. Because the Doctor Strange variant from the trailer is less evil than a large company refusing to pay someone properly.
16. Detective Pikachu
Back to the jokes again! Who doesn’t want this cuddly little fella to appear in another film?
Now that Ryan Reynolds has been name dropped twice, let’s talk about something some of you may be thinking at this point, which is “where’s Deadpool?” Fans want Deadpool to appear in this film, but I really don’t like that idea. I love the character, I love the comic books and I love the solo films, but a lazy Deadpool cameo in the MCU sounds unbelievably boring. It’s a cameo which would consist of obvious fourth wall breaking punchlines, and gags centred around interrupted attempts to drop the f-bomb in a family friendly film. So I’m more than happy to have Ryan Reynolds in this film, twice in fact, but I just don’t want the Deadpool portal to open up for the sake of pleasing a crowd who are asking for too much.
17. Mara Wilson as Matilda
You think Doctor Strange is against the ropes with an evil version of himself? Wait until he comes across a magic user who can move things with her mind. Before Doctor Strange can even wave his hands to begin casting a spell, Matilda will have thrown a newt at him and made some delicious pancakes.
18. Elmo wielding nunchucks
The concept sells itself. I won’t waste your time explaining it.
19. Lin-Manuel Miranda as Alexander Hamilton
What? You thought B-Rabbit was going to have a rap battle alone? We can do better than that. This obviously wouldn’t be the biggest film ever if we didn’t bring in one of the greatest creative minds of our time.
20. Nicolas Cage as every Nicolas Cage character ever
This is where the film finally reaches the height of its powers. A finale which consists of every Nicolas Cage in the multiverse screaming at each other. It will be both the best and worst thing you ever see, but it might just win Nic Cage another Oscar.
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All joking aside, I can see why there is so much discussion and speculation surrounding this film, and it all comes down to passion. So while I am being a sarcastic idiot about this, it is great to see so many people coming together to share their passion and swap ideas. I personally think the best thing for people to do at this point if they want to know what happens in the film, is just wait and watch the film when its released. We don’t need to guess all of the surprises ahead of time, in fact what we’re doing is ruining the surprises. As a good friend said recently, you’re not trying to solve a murder or crack a case, you’re just wanting to enjoy a film, so stop actively preventing yourself from doing that by trying to spoil the surprises. Would you rather go to this film, see a surprise cameo on screen like Hugh Jackman as Wolverine, and have the smug feeling of “ha I knew it”, or have the feeling of sheer excitement which rushes through the crowd and causes everyone to clap and cheer because they’ve been taken completely by surprise. It all comes down to whether you want an authentic experience in the cinema, of if you’re more interested in the fan equivalent of “gotcha” journalism. It’s not for anyone, least of all myself, to say what constitutes being a “good” or “bad” fan, but if you want to ruin the surprises so you can claim prior knowledge and superiority, you might want to consider the possibility you’re watching these films for the wrong reasons.
I love seeing the imagination fans have, but I still think it’s worth lowering our expectations. Spider-Man: No Way Home has potentially made some people spoilt, which then puts a huge amount of pressure on the films being made. Not every film needs to be, or even should be, a big event like Endgame or No Way Home. It’s exactly the same in the comic books, big events come along every so often. If they happen all the time then fans get annoyed because the creators are so busy flipping the table there’s no time for the board to be reset. If the ongoing narrative is constantly one big event after another then everything remains in the air and nothing lands. There needs to be room for smaller projects, and for character arcs to play out. Otherwise, all you’re experiencing are diminishing attempts to shock and surprise, rather than impactful stories and emotional beats for the characters.
It may turn out that I’m wrong, and every “leaked” character legitimately appears in this film. In which case, great! I love being proven wrong. I would much rather be the person who has lower expectations and is blown away by a film, than be the person whose expectations are higher than any film could ever possibly match. And in particular I don’t understand arguing with strangers online about something nobody knows anything about. Best thing to do for now is stay civil and respectful, build on each other’s points rather than argue, and then have a great time when the film reaches cinemas.
‘Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness’ is released in UK cinemas in May.
