Never Say “No”

As a very attractive man, you’ll encounter many females that want to be with you but you do not reciprocate. Typically they’re from the attractive or the very attractive women class. Once in a while — especially under the influence of alcohol — young females and the invisible female will also come to you with unwanted attention. The trick here is never to be rude to them. You need to charm them as much as the rest of the class, give them attention, and realize how big of an idiot you are being in a room of drunk people and you should vouch never to be there again.

You need to give them attention because in any situation, you want more help than obstacles. In case of anything happening, the female might be willing, or might have a way to dissolve the issue — especially if you don’t want them to be the issue.

You especially need to give more attention to the invisible class of women — they innately feel like you’re a player, but by showering with them with attention, they gain the illusion that you’re not “one of them” and you’re genuinely kind and friendly, something they truly hope you are before they approach you.

If you’d like to make such a person an orbiter, then you should begin the strategy of friend-zoning such a person. The strategy is rather simple, but the art is the subtle implementation: you need to subtly lead the conversation to be about other women you’re attracted to (will refer to as “crush” in the following). It’s most ideal to have your crush as public figures, not someone you two can approach, to avoid potential hassles. Make that person feel like you’re treating her like a buddy, not as a potential partner. If you want to leave traces of letting that person still think she has a chance with you, occasionally comment on things she has that your crush also has, such as “I really love Audrey Hepburn’s effortless elegant style, and I see that in you too — love it!”

If you don’t intend to make such a person an orbiter, but you are okay with having such a person in your life, the strategy here is Carrot and Stick: you will give her an imagery that is seemingly obtainable, but in reality leads to nowhere. For instance, if you’re facing a woman that you don’t find desirable because of her lousy career track and the need to feel like a princess and wanting a prince charming to rescue her, then you should casually bring up your ex-girlfriends who have done ridiculous careers. Such as “I’m only attracted to women who have done crazy careers”, you can begin by saying, “the last girl I dated graduated top of her class from Trinity College, Cambridge and now works as a quant at Goldman”. Of course, never lie — if you’re a very attractive man, then your ex should be something like that, otherwise you’re just an attractive man (or invisible, or ugly). By giving her such imagery, she will immediately self evaluate. She will either decide that she will turn around and make her career more desirable looking to you (this is the seemingly obtainable part), or she decides she can’t play within your league. If it’s the former, notice that you have no obligation to like or love her even if she obtains such a goal — you can repeat the carrot and stick strategy to her again under the rare circumstances where she matches your last carrot and stick.

If you don’t intend to see such a person again and you want to quickly shut down the advance, then you have to throw out something she has no way of obtaining (such as physical traits such as race, or family traits such as family wealth). Now of course, you are very likely to be labeled as shallow if you use such a strategy. So unless you have to shut down the advance quickly, try to avoid using this strategy. Similar to the above strategies, you need to subtly divert the topic into people you’re attracted to. You can say things like: from physical traits: “I’m only into Japanese women — my family told me that if I marry anyone who is not Japanese, I won’t get the family money”, to family traits: “I find myself only attracted to the Medina type people — you know, since I went to Lakeside. New Englander are just too boring to me. But it’s getting hard because Japanese don’t study abroad anymore”. After hearing such a comment, your subject will quickly evaluate her social standing with you, and label you as a superficial snob and hopefully will leave you alone quickly. If your subject still doesn’t leave you alone, expand on your comment more until she feels annoyed, by saying things such as, “I once got bored with American prep girls and dated someone who went to Havergal from Canada. I actually was shocked by how poor Canadians are compared to Americans.” (Wonder why I only mention prep schools? Because anyone can attend an Ivy, but mostly the wealthy attend prep schools) You’re intentionally labeling yourself as a snob and make your subject dislike you. But the above strategy is still better than a straight no because the latter makes your subject angry at you, which could lead to immediate retaliation. By disliking you, your subject gains the illusion of control: that she is the one rejecting you (but you know better it’s actually the opposite).