True fear is in our minds
I think that everyday we live in fear. We grow up to be afraid of going to jail, losing friends, offending people but there is a different fear lurking: mental fear. What you think and how you perceive things is how you build your own personal jail cell. A cell that you can leave at anytime without even moving but stay there for eternity using all your strength to escape. I want to cover all the types of fear that I identify in my life and what how I try to cope with it.
Fear of Commitment
One of my biggest horrors is the terror of totally committing yourself to something in mind, body, and spirit. I constantly worry about being judged by others and let their thinking dictate my own self worth. If I were to try something off the beaten path and fail, humiliation and laughter would follow from the crowd. This leads me to the conclusion that it would be better off not to try and just take what comes naturally to me. If I am great at something without trying my perception to others will be that I am a natural and have no need to do further work on my skill. If I did put effort into something I wanted to cultivate, I would feel as if my entire self would be judged upon that outcome. While the success is glamorous, the failure would be too much to take. That feeling of judgement and dismay seems much worse than never taking that risk and just settling for whatever is given to you. With that thought, it feels more comfortable to crawl into any holes you can find in life, and not get in anyone’s way.
My solution to fear of commitment is a work in progress. For me, its a constant process of asking myself questions. Why am I doing this? Why am I NOT doing this? What am I being influenced by? Am I challenging myself today? In my eyes, to commit something is to push yourself by advancing outside of your comfort zone. To repeatedly leave your control area is to grow, and to grow is to advance yourself. Whether that would be asking someone out, trying something new, or sayings whats on your mind. There is no failure, there is only making the unknown known, that is my approach. The biggest problem with fear of commitment is that it never goes away, it must be constantly suppressed by your highly available brain day after day. It is natural for me to settle, to align with the status quo, but to be alive is to challenge that status.
Fear of death
We are all aware of death at a very young age, whether it confronts at an early age or in our twilight years, it is inevitable. Death is the ultimate garbage man for human bodies and he or she has never missed a pickup. Fear of death is another complicated thought because it can become mixed up. In one way, death saves you, death tells you that jumping off this bridge is a bad idea because you will break your neck. You need that voice inside you to live. On the other hand, if you let fear of death take hold of you, it can consume you. Soon, you are questioning going to the beach because of the increased chance of skin cancer. While that may be true, that should not stop you from living your life. As soon as death gets in the way of doing what you want, you need to punch that scoundrel down and never look back. I can not stress this enough, to be fearless is to grow and to live. There is no 30 day fear of death gone pill. This fear, like everything else worth pursuing must be kicked in the teeth everyday. That is the hardest part, the repetition of never giving in produces excellence and frees us from fear.
I hope you enjoyed this reading, I am trying to improve my writing so bear with me if there are some errors. I hope this reading helps you improve yourself and help others. Remember to promote the change you want to see in the world in yourself before you can pass it on to mankind. Help others conquer their fear so that they in turn can help you. I left some inspirational goodies at the bottom.