Let’s start with the basics. Egyptians, Antient Greeks, Aztecs, Venetians… They all had so much fun. That’s the key trend inspiring a plethora of new season’s hot — and cold — mask alternatives.

1. Eye mask — going to become compulsory in all places, for your own protection. Sleep well, even on the move.

2. Carnival mask — apparently Venice is making a comeback so let’s help it out even more. This has always been the perfect option for those freedom lovers. I especially love the masks with loooong noses, for automatic social distance. Or, the tragic Greek masks for those willing to show us a bit of empathy!

3. Cow head —ideally a real one, easy to pick up from your local slaughter house along with a couple of traces of Cowid. Or…

Diary of the confinement, told in flowers

A short tragicomedic story on the ups and downs, hopes and despairs of the lockdown, told in flowers (and an occasional extra object…)

Legs. To keep your legs in top shape, try running home with your shopping. You can start by attaching to yourself your supermarket basket with a day’s worth of groceries; then increasing it up to a trolley full of weekly shopping. Alternate between these to get a good cardio, all on your way back from the grocery store.

Back. Hard one to exercise but if you put those 50 kg dumbbells you never use into your backpack and carry them around, the weight will pull you back and down, thus creating that perfect conflict between you trying to stay in…

Lately, I’ve been making many discoveries. I think it’s because the leaves have fallen, trees are naked and you can see what’s been hiding behind them. Like you can now look straight into the opposite neighbours’ bedroom and find out there’s nothing going on… Here’s a few others:

1. People are getting lonelier and lonelier. I see phone numbers everywhere, just left there, just in case, maybe someone will get the hint, maybe someone will call… Here’s one left in a car (with a misspelled ‘thank you’…). Other examples included one just stuck to a lamppost and on a piece of…

I tried to go to the zoo recently but the price of the ticket didn’t get me much further than the gates. Luckily, this zoo had a free part where “people like me” could still hang out and meet plenty of exotic species (including cute waiters). Very soon it became clear that I was having way more fun in this part than I would ever have done on the inside. So here comes my photo safari.

First, the human species rolled in, in tiny cages! This parade lasted for hours, with small, large, cute, fluffy, scary, aggressive, depressive, majestic, romantic…

Curiosity is all the rage and for a good reason. It is a key ingredient of a successful life because it can take you on many adventures and open up possibilities.

Here’re some possibilities that could open up if you’re curious:

Kidnapping — I was sitting in a dodgy café when I became exceedingly curious about the three men opposite me who had been pointing in my direction and discussing me and in some strange language. I was so curious, I went over to say hi. …

100. Queue in a shop. If you live in a city where the only air-conditioned place is the supermarket, follow these simple steps. Pick the shop with the longest possible queue and join in. (Luckily you’re probably not the only one doing this so long queues should be easy to find and should only get longer with your help.) When, if ever, the queue is over, just get back in. If they notice and kick you out, go to a different shop.

3. And if you really love that supermarket and just don’t see yourself leaving, dress up as any…

Find out in no time with this simple test, tick all that apply.

He is always out at night and comes back in the morning only if hungry

He gets into fights, a lot

He sleeps all day

He likes to climb things

He screams at you when the toilet is dirty

How many times did you tell him the plant pot is not the toilet

He pretends he doesn’t know how to cook

When he eats, he makes a mess

Sometimes he draws blood

He ignores you most of the time and won’t talk back

When he does talk…