Resistance mechanism no 8: living another life


Have you ever wondered who else could you be? What other profession might you have excelled at if you were to choose again? How else could you have construed your life if there was a possibility to go back? Or are you more like me — day-dreaming every time things get harder, dreaming of escaping it all and starting a simpler life?

My husband keeps on laughing that some day he may find we are moving to the outskirts of the world to grow happy carrots. Somehow carrots or avocados feel more trouble-free than, for example, a vineyard. Or a hotel. Or a restaurant. These are the typical “let’s-drop-it-all-and-run-away scenarios” played in our heads by Resistance. Somehow it feels that this new adventure will, by some miracle, be problem free. Lighter. Less of a burden.

Why? Why would it be so? Why do we think that a different life will be the answer to our struggles? In the end we are us. We take with us who we are and what we do. The external circumstances may have some impact on us but probably less that we envision. Have you ever changed a job because it was unbearable only to find yourself in a new position having the exact same issues? We take our issues with us. They are glued to our butt, dragged around as we run from one day-dream to another. Resistance loves such day-dreaming. It is its most fertile ground. It can keep our minds busy day in day out. Stopping us from doing the job we set ourselves out to do. Giving us an excuse of a better live, unlived life.

If I catch myself day-dreaming about happy carrots, I look hard at the problem that got me to day-dream. Because more often than not this problem is the problem within me. Carrots will not cure it. Even the happy ones. But if we consider day-dreaming as a signal from Resistance telling us that we got stuck in something that blocks our way to achievement. It can be a sign to reflect. To regroup. To reframe. It can be a sign that we have some growing up to do. This is an ultimate way to beat Resistance. To use its destructive force to our advantage.

Other stories about my battles with Resistance:

Resistance mechanism no 7: validation and success

Resistance mechanism no 6: I will do it tomorrow

Resistance mechanism no 5: no one will want it

— Resistance mechanism no 4: someone else has already done it

Resistance mechanism no 3: helping others instead of doing your work

Resistance mechanism no 2: being busy with the small stuff

Resistance mechanism no 1: the dream about the next (better) project