I’ve come to realize that nothing really matters.. Literally everything comes to an end and life is just life so why spend it stressing over people, debt, death, jobs, money, anything?? It’s not worth it! Eventually you’ll get over it and forget what you were stressing about, but at the time your body went through so much, you have no idea. Why put your body/mind through any of that?
Recently i was stressing over relationship problems, and a very large debt i owed that i was unaware of. I pay for school out of pocket, live on my own with no help. I have car payments, insurance payments, rent, utilities, groceries, other necessities, and school to worry about. Then i had to add on $3,076.70. My boyfriend of 5 years decided he needed a break, and was having the time of his life smoking whatever while i lived and handed everything by myself. But I dont blame him. I needed this time to come so i could realize none of it matters. It’s all materialistic. Money is just money. I dont have the highest paying job in the world, but it does allow me to pay my bills every month and still have a little cash left over.
Have you ever had a debt collecter agency call you? It’s one of the worst feelings in the world. The way they talk to you like youre a criminal already, and how persistant they are. They put so much pressure on you without knowing who you personally are. You could volunteer at the homeless shelter every day and help the community more than anyone else but if you forgot to pay your phone bill a while back they will call you and hound you like you killed someone and have to pay for it. I hate that. You have no idea what im going through, you dont know what ive been through. You dont know shit about me yet you have the audacity to call a complete stranger and treat them this way? STRESSFUL.
But ive learned that theres nothing to do. It has to be paid so pay it. Take your time. Dont go broke over it. As long as youre paying it off, everythings okay. Life is just life. I’m only 20 but im already starting to realize that its so much easier to let it go. Dont let anything get to you. I was the type to alwasy want to be ahead of everyone. I wanted to make sure i worked my ass off so i could have a nice house and live comfortably. But that takes time, i was expecting it straight out of high school. Doing this caused me to push my boyfriend to his limits. He wasnt on the same level as me. He was more chill, and relazed about life. What ever happens happens.. I wish i looked at everything that way earlier, i could of saved a lot of the time spent stressing and put it towards having fun. Living life.
You cant control everything. Or most of the time, anything. But you can control how you react to it. Dont let things get the best of you unless they deserve it. Smoke a blunt once in a while, drink a glass of wine or two. Go for walks with your dog, or family, and go explore. Do things that make you happy and appreciate life because it’s too short to be taken advantage of. It’s not easy, but if you truly believe you can do it, it isnt impossible.