Someone told me,
“Just because you lose something doesn’t mean you lost.”
It’s true. But literally, if only being lost could make you lose something. When you lost yourself, you literally are lose everything. Because when you lose everthing, you’re only had yourself to hold on. And if you even lose yourself, you’re just waiting for the time till you lose everything. So, being lost really scared me more than anything or anyone. Call me self-centred, but really, I’m only trust my self compared to others.
The worst part is, I’m lost.
I’m not sure who are the real friends I have now. I don’t even trust someone I ever trust with all of my self, anymore.
But somehow, I’m trying to trust him again.
Meanwhile, my self against every kind of trust-him-again. There was something like a fight in my mind between trusting him again or respect my self. Somehow, I’m trying to trust him. Therefore, I’m lost now. I don’t even know how to control my feeling when I found another lie from him — and painful— conspired with my good friend. The only one can control is my self, and I’ve been losing it.
I’ve been losing me.