Dear Harry Potter fandom
A letter from a trans Potter fan.
I’ve been going back and forth with myself about writing something like this for quite some time. Some will ask what’s the point? Some will outright dismiss anyone still professing to be in the fandom. Some can’t even look at Potter merch without feeling something akin to disgust, anger, shame.
But I think writing this is less about the people who’s minds are already made up, and more about the people on the fence, the people on the fringes, who don’t know what’s going on or why. The people who are not terminally on twitter, the people who may dip into online fandom from time to time, but otherwise all they see is what the mainstream media deems publishable. The people in fandom who are allies and don’t know what to do.
This is for you, the fringe Potter fans, from a transgender ex-Potter fan.
So. To start with? My credentials.
I first read the books when I was 18, or perhaps 19. I was on holiday in the middle of nowhere near Oban in Scotland, with three other 18 or 19 year olds. We were having a last hurrah after sixth form and before college, and had decided to go and relax in the Scottish countryside for a couple weeks. One friend taught us it is entirely possible to burn a croissant in a microwave (how she did it we actually still don’t know). Another had brought his copies of the Potter books with him.
Until that point I had sort of vehemently refused to read them, intent as I was on being Grown Up and not reading little kids books anymore. But he put forth a good argument and there was little else to do, so I relented.
At that point they were only three books, and I read them cover to cover within a couple days. Sitting comfortably in the garden of the tiny little cabin we had rented, catching what little sun Scotland afforded, between bouts of teenage rambunctiousness and commentary, after that one time we hitch-hiked to the nearest shop to get more food and ended up listening to a worm farmer talk about worms…
You could say I came to be into Harry Potter in a pretty big way after that.
I’ve racked up a modest 129,393 words of Harry Potter fanfic on AO3 (I just checked, I’ve still got them up), and another 24,408 on Potions and Snitches, that’s 153,801 words of Potter fanfic, mostly Drarry, but also Severitus, with probably a lot more than that languishing away half finished in my hardrive and GDocs. I’ve got far, far more than that bookmarked for reading of course, plenty of old favourites, as well as some newer ones from before everything happened.
I’m also an illustrator, so I’ve drawn countless pieces of fan art in various media, from one-off character designs, to full blown chapter illustrations, portraits and even digital comic pieces.
I once chatted amiably in LiveJournal with Cassandra Claire, mostly because I had produced a few illustrations for the fan fics that got her famous — and then infamous.
I have all the core books, and early copies of the ‘Fantastic Beasts’ and ‘Hogwarts a History’ charity novellas. I waited in a queue at midnight outside the local bookshop when the fifth book was due to be released. I had the sixth and seventh books delivered day of release. I devoured each of them in hours, both because I needed to know what happened, and because I didn’t want to be spoiled by someone who had read them more quickly than I.
I shed tears; for Sirius. For Dumbledore. For Snape. For the twins. Even for Dobby.
I hated the Epilogue with a passion.
When the films came out, I had some very strong opinions about production values and casting, about script changes, locations, specific acting or directorial choices. (I really didn’t like the original casting choice for Dumbledore, for example, but I came to adore the choice for Snape, even if I did think Alan Rickman was too old at first.)
I joined Pottermore. Twice, because I was Sorted wrong the first time; “I’m a Slytherin, thank you very much” I muttered to myself as I carefully tailored my answers the second time around.
I had as much merch as I could afford, most of it either general Potter merch, or specific Slytherin merch. Socks, ties, scarves, sweaters, posters, badges, bookmarks, the DVDs, notebooks, stationary, figures and toys, mugs, insulated travel coffee mugs…
I bonded with family members who are no longer with us over Harry Potter.
One of my second year projects on my BA Illustration course was a set of full colour acrylic painted illustrations for Prisoner of Azkaban. I still have them somewhere. Pretty sure I got high marks for them.
But everything changed in 2020, shortly before the first Lockdown.
I’m trans.
Specifically, when I read the books I was gender nonconforming, a bit of a tomboy. I eschewed dresses, skirts, anything girly or feminine, unless forced into it. I was bisexual and young and still learning and still didn't have the words for what I was, or what I was feeling, because my entire school career had been under Section28. That would all come much later.
Since then I have come to understand myself a little better. I’m Genderqueer. I’m non-binary, transmasc, and I use they/he pronouns. I’m capital Q Queer; preferring the umbrella term because the specifics are a mouthful even for me: asexual, demi-pan-romantic, leaning more toward men than women.
I hadn’t seen the last Potter film, as my fandom tastes had moved on. I did see Fantastic Beasts though, hoping it would reignite my affections — and for a short time it did, one of those fics in my AO3 is the first part of a now abandoned Newt&Credence fix-it. But I followed Rowling on twitter, just because I like following authors whose writing I enjoy.
Along with the rest of the queer community, and her fans in general, I watched with some bafflement as Rowling had her ‘senior moment’ and clicked ‘like’ on a few worrying tweets. By that point I was already moving in trans circles on twitter; we were having problems with Graham Linehan and the other growing-in-infamy ‘gender critical feminists’. Thing’s have always been fraught for the less conformist parts of the queer community, and ‘being conformist’ is not something one could truthfully say of the trans community. But the internet, and particularly twitter, has been a potent catalyst to the incendiary transphobic types, so even before Rowling’s senior moment, we were already fighting more battles than any one community should ever have to.
I watched in continued bafflement as things quickly went south. Rowling didn't react well to questions about her twitter usage. She became a little less circumspect about the types of people she listened to. And the types of people she didn’t. Some had seen it coming, especially those who had taken a deeper look at her work, but to a lot of us this was shocking.
And then she published her open letter.
We all know the one.
She just has concerns. She worries about women’s and girl’s safety. She particularly worries about ‘autistic girl’s’ safety. She supports us, she has trans friends, she’ll march with us against transphobic discrimination. She suffered abuse at the hands of her ex-husband. She just has concerns.
Better writers than I have already taken her open letter to task, but let me just say a few things, from the perspective of a transmasc, AFAB, card-carrying autistic person.
The rates of autism are, indeed, higher in the trans community than they are in the general population. Roughly six times higher, actually. And that is across the board, trans women (the numbers may skew a little higher for trans women, who may have been more easily diagnosed autistic when younger as they were believed to be boys), trans men and non binary people. The reasons for it are not entirely known, yet, but there are a number of theories — none of them the ones GCs propose.
(Check out my article Autism and Gender for more on this topic.)
But that’s not why Rowling brought it up. Or it’s not entirely why she brought it up.
These rates have, obviously, risen in the last couple decades. To most of us the reason they have risen is clear; rising acceptance and knowledge of trans experiences has meant more people feel more safe to come out, and more people understand why they feel the way they do, often earlier in their lives than previous generations did.
To Rowling and the ‘GC movement’ though, the rising numbers mean ‘social contagion’, or the spread of a cult, and this is where the ‘young autistic girls’ thing comes in. Rowling and the ‘GC movement’ are under the impression that being autistic means one cannot understand ones own mind and experiences, so if a ‘young autistic girl’ comes out as a trans boy or nonbinary? Clearly that ‘girl’ has been persuaded by outside forces.
This is both transphobic and ablest as all get-out.
Firstly, there is no evidence that ‘Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria’ exists, at all.
Secondly, declaring that autistic kids can’t or don’t understand themselves is to remove their autonomy. Declaring that they’re just too autistic to know any better is painting the whole autistic community as ill equipped, as naïve, as stupid.
Additionally, painting kids in general as unable to understand themselves in this way? Has worrying implications for Gillick Competence. Worrying implications that are already impacting and have already impacted real lives.
To many of us, the outcome of this is obvious, but apparently the GCs and JK herself just can’t see it — or maybe they refuse to see it. These kids, treated in this way, disbelieved, gaslit, faced with ableism and transphobia from their own families, while already facing the ableism and transphobia of school and the world in general…
Autistics already have higher rates of anxiety, depression, self injurious behaviours and suicide. Trans people already have higher rates of anxiety, depression, injurious behaviour and suicide. Combine them, because you refuse to simply accept your child is who they are telling you they are, and what do you think the outcome is going to be?
Please just think on that a bit. And then try to figure out why JK and her movement keep persisting in spreading these hateful ideas.
Now, that done with, back on to the point of this article.
Since she posted that letter, things have steadily gotten worse and worse. The woman who was once held in the highest esteem for her fantastic books that got even the most reluctant of readers to give it a try, was now casually throwing out transphobic dog whistles and alienating her queer, and specifically her trans fans.
Some trans fans tried to reason with her. Some stepped away entirely. Some were so upset they lashed out.
Almost as a whole, the trans community has lost all respect and faith in a woman who once, for many, provided a safe space to pretend that the rest of the awful, anti-trans world didn’t exist, if only for a short time. That loss, for many, is enormous.
So when I say we understand how you, as a Potter fan, feel? I’m not lying. I’m not just saying it to pretend we have common ground. Many of us really do get it, we’re right there with you, confused, hurt, lost. In fact, those of us who are trans probably feel the betrayal far more acutely than you can ever realise.
And this, too, is why so many in the trans community are also losing faith in the allies who can’t find it in themselves to just step away.
A common sentiment you, as Harry Potter fans, have probably come across in the last year or so is that trans people are sick of you coming up with excuses to continue engaging with Harry Potter at all. You may have been told that continuing to be a Potter fan now is tantamount to supporting transphobia. You may have been told that trans people can no longer trust you, that they regard Potter fans with suspicion. Maybe you even had a trans person curse you out and then block you on Twitter when you tried to explain.
If you’re a queer, or ally, Potter fan, this all probably sounds alarming and upsetting. You’re queer! You have and love your trans friends! You sign the petitions, you write to your MPs, you march alongside us! You do everything right! Right?
So why are you, a queer or cishet but ally, Potter fan suddenly being treated like some pariah?
After all, Potter was a formative thing for you. You found yourself, you found friends, you found community through this fandom. For many years, this was a place of refuge, of connection, it was a place of creativity and laughter and love.
Suddenly you’re being asked to forget all that? To drop it? To pretend it never happened, or at the very least to re-evaluate and move on from it?
Yes. Sorry, but yes.
I know what Potter meant to you, because I was there too. I made friends in the community too, I created for the community too, I spent more money than I probably should have on Potter merch too. I expended time and energy on the community, just like you did. I get it. It’s a wrench to even think about leaving it all behind, after you’ve done so much, spent so much, formed relationships and built community. I get it. I really do.
But this is more important.
The trans community is under attack. The trans community has always been under attack, but the last few years have been so much worse. And Rowling?
Well. Rowling has social capitol. She is an actual household name. She has 14 million followers on twitter alone. You say her name and pretty much anywhere you go, across the whole damn world, everyone will know who you mean, and if by chance you find someone who doesn’t know the name Rowling, they’ll still very likely know what Harry Potter is.
And that, right there, is the crux of the problem.
At this point, simply no longer buying official Potter merch, or the official Potter games, or not spending to go see her new films, or the play, or buying her tie-in franchises, or even not buying her other books that have nothing to do with Potter — simply not spending money on her isn’t enough. Because Rowling already has more money than any normal person could spend in a lifetime. Not giving her more isn’t going to hurt her in any substantial way.
What needs to happen, what is being asked of you, is that you stop giving her free advertising.
Stop talking about her. Stop promoting her work for her. Starve her of the attention.
Yes, that means stop spending on her, but it also means stop participating in Potter Big Bangs, stop making Potter fan art, stop writing Potter fan fic, stop cosplaying as Potter characters. Stop making and selling Potter fan merch. Just stop.
Just stop.
Keep your bookmarked fic, your galleries of saved fan art, keep your communities and your friendships. But move on. Find new franchises to expend your energy on. There’s plenty of comparable, and much better, YA and NA fiction to read and create fan communities around. Even within the fantasy genre alone, but your horizons widen further if you step into other genres. I’ll even provide you a list at the end of this article, so you can do just that.
But just stop.
Step away from the Potter fandom. Denounce JK Rowling.
It’s such a simple thing.
Put your words into action. Don’t just say you’re with us, prove it.
H
And as promised, suggested books to replace your Potter addiction — these are in no particular order, some suitable for kids, some suitable for teens, some more suited for adults. Take your pick and honestly, just expand your horizons!
The Underland Chronicles by Suzanne Collins
The Earthsea series by Ursula K LeGuin
Wizard’s Hall by Jane Yolen
The Percy Jackson series by Rick Riordan
The Worst Witch series by Jill Murphy
The Beyond the Deepwoods series by Paul Stewart and Chris Riddell
Mortal Engines by Philip Reeve
The Skulduggery Pleasant series by Derek Landy
The Artemis Fowl series by Eoin Colfer
The Wee Free Men/Tiffany Aching books by Terry Pratchett
The Discworld series by Terry Pratchett
Truckers, Diggers and Wings by Terry Pratchett
The Bartimaeus Trilogy by Jonathan Stroud
Mossflower by Brian Jacques
The Scholomance series by Lauren James
The Crestomanci series by Diana Wynne Jones
The Inkheart trilogy by Cornelia Funke
The Charlie Bone books by Jenny Nimmo
The Worldquake books by Scarlett Thomas
The Black Magician Trilogy by Trudi Canavan
The Summoner series by Taran Matharu
The Old Kingdom series by Garth Nix
The Stravaganza books by Mary Hoffman
The Locked Tomb series by Tamsyn Muir
The Alex Stern series by Leigh Bardugo
The Wheel of Time books by Robert Jordan
The Mistborn series by Brandon Sanderson
The Skyward Series by Brandon Sanderson
The Pern series by Anne McCaffrey
The Kingkiller Chronicles by Patrick Rothfuss
The Rivers of London series by Ben Aaronovitch
The Wayward Children books by Seanan McGuire
Carry On and Wayward Son by Rainbow Rowell
The Song of the Lioness books by Tamora Pierce
The Immortals Quartet by Tamora Pierce
The Legacy of Orïsha books by Tomi Adeyemi
Labyrinth Lost by Zoraida Córdova
The Sorcerer of the Wildeeps books by Kai Ashante Wilson
The Tensorate series by J.Y. Yang