SEEING THE FUTURE

A crystal ball reader, I am not. But, for the past few months, visions of family and friends, old stomping grounds and the great Pacific Ocean have flooded my brain. An absolute realist who shies away from being overly positive, I’m in utter shock that my mind would allow these futuristic thoughts. Five moves, becoming a mommy and a divorce have added some uncertainty to everyday life, along with the inability to live, dwell and set up shop in the comforting place I call home.

Fear has been ever present. Anxiety and worry my chaperones upon waking each day. It’s been like this over 18 months. But something has shifted, I’m different, and it feels amazing. Perhaps it is because my immediate context has changed, since my most recent move with my toddler. Or maybe it is due to the fact that I am allowing myself to feed the energy of actually being back home…I can see what life is like for us. I can feel the ocean air. I can taste my Dad’s specialty of baked chicken and red potatoes. I envision my daughter laughing and playing and dancing with her Nana and Ba everyday.

The fear of entertaining these visions and thoughts and predilections is gone, now. Contentment and ease are what feelings I experience when the visions arise. Taking out the trash, answering email and journaling are now peppered with sweet, supportive thoughts of what I know and what I love and miss.

Home is near and my mind is now driving me toward it. What was once something I tried to burry in my brain is now a celebrated experience. With great gratitude is how the days continue, as the mind has proven to be beyond powerful. It is so provocative and strong that it nudges us to accept the permeating visions as not just dreams, but potential reality.

Amanda Jane Avis is a lover of all things movement, fitness and wellness. Teaching clients/students is her groove, while also being a mommy to the fabulous Phoebe. Find more at malamotion.com