What Keeps You Awake At Night When They Are Working— Mop Swingers: Episode 48.
The continuing true story of mop swinging brothers, Adam and Peter, trying to make it from Detroit, to the movie business.
Adam struggles to push a roll of tires away from the wall, to gain access to a power outlet. “It seems like this whole place is about to take the big plunge.”
The power generator for the Zamboni is on the fritz again. If it’s not one thing, it’s god damn another. Peter fiddles with the worn out plug. “What’s that guy’s name? He did Topsy Turvy.”
Adam pointlessly vacuums under the tires. “Mike Leigh?”
Peter mops the floor spotless. Five seconds later a mechanic walks all over it. “ He is always exploring something. Now he is exploring nothing but remakes. Get got to get in there and save it, before it all crumbles down like Rome. Kramer of Kramer got the Oscar over Apocalypse now. Much to one man’s shagrin.”
Adam walks in the kitchen. He is nearly knocked out of his boots by a smell so terrible, it almost drives him mad. “Judas Priest! What is that?”
Peter locates the destination. He walks to the fridge with his shirt over his mouth. “Brace yourself. I’m going to open it.”
When Peter opens the fridge, what they see, makes them wish Peter did not open the door.
The Band comes on the radio. Levon Helm sings about wanting a place to sleep for the night.
Adam wraps a towel around his face, then puts on sunglasses, before he dares even get close to the fridge.
An ingrate of a daytime employee must have left food in some Tupperware, for possibly decades. At least it used to be good. Now, it had grown into a beast with a will to live.
Adam warns Peter it may be ill advised to try and knock the thing out of the fridge, into the mop bucket, then dump it in a sewer outside.
Before Peter even got his plan underway, the water and chemical filled mop bucket, flips over on the flat kitchen floor. It seems to trip on forces of pure malevolence alone. “I would blame God for that one, but I don’t think even he can be that mean.”
Adam starts the endless process of mopping up the puddle on the floor. It looks like an overflowing sewer. “That depends. What if you had a gnostic belief in the universe. Then you would believe the exact opposite about god.”
Peter plugs in the Zamboni, puts the brush on medium style, and the water and soap distribution on low, and took care of that puddle in no time. “I never heard of that. Why would a being with infinite power be such a jerk?”
The mop bucket is truly up to no good on that day. It cracks Adam in the shin when he tries to put it away. “That is a good point, I guess. I forgot how the story goes. I think his wife cheated on him, and he never got over it.”
Peter sings the Johny Cash cover of, “He Stopped Loving Her Today.”