#17 Can you promise me?
To love me and to keep me in love?
To put in efforts and keep the fire alive?
-Akila Sridhar
Can you make me 7 promises to calm the rush in my mind? Can you calm the storm and be an escape in the floods? Can you be an aid and keep me in place? Can you acknowledge the force of nature that I am? Can you put me in my place? Can you be my Alpha male and let me be a hypocrite?
1.
Can you promise me that you’ll keep me on my toes?
That you’ll trouble me and keep me running around in circles. I need to feel the irritation in my gut every time we argue and that must be enough to keep me hooked on to you. I don’t need to be called beautiful or love of your life, but if you could pull my leg, I’d be forever around you.
2.
Can you promise me that you’ll delegate work and worry when we’re home?
I don’t need to treated like a queen around you. I need to be treated like you’re the king and I did choose right. I need to feel the trust that flows from your side. I’m not fond of playing the damsel in distress, something I was taught from my early years. Nothing is worth if I have to play dumb to get, not even you. So I need you to convey that you trust me and find ‘home’ in me.
I need to feel wanted- maybe a defect in me but honey, this is how I’m built. Give me even menial jobs like laundry or dishes and you’d never find me complaining for I’d be busy seeing your attempt to appear vulnerable and I’d see you stronger than before. It’s a simple way to let me see your masculinity by not being insecure about it.
3.
Can you not change on my account?
Can you maintain your independence while forcing me to keep mine? I don’t need you to accompany me everywhere for everything. I don’t need a baby sitter in you. I need to be shown my place at times and I need to see you as an individual who has issues and priorities just like me. I need to learn that you’re as important as I am to me.
4.
Can you let me do something for you?
Be it getting you chocolates or a pat on your back.
I don’t intend to fight your insecurities and uncertainties as part of my routines. I need you to be strong however you are, whoever you choose to be and wherever we choose to be. Can you take a step back every now and then where I can take the heat and bat the world. I’m signing up for a life time of adventure where I don’t need you to navigate for me, I want you to hand over the paddle every once in a while- it’ll tell me that you think I’m more than capable of taking the lead. It’ll mean the world to someone like me.
5.
Can you not buy me chocolates and flowers?
I don’t need a prince on a horse, I need you. I need the real you who prefers lose t shirts and coffee. I need the raw you, who likes kissing me as much as he likes his own space. I need you to pamper me with words and attention rather than textbook romantic items- they mean nothing to me in comparison to knowing that you were listening to me, hearing me out, giving me your time.
6.
Can you search for me in a crowd?
I might be secure enough not to hear how much I mean to you everyday, I might be mature to not expect the world from you, I might be stupid to appreciate distance and I might be one of a kind and cut you slack more than you deserve- but I need to know that you think me without me sitting on your face or breathing down your neck. On the days I succumb to my comfort space, I need you to approach without having been provoked by me or my anger. I need you to think of me and look for me. That’ll tell me loads about the person I’m in your life.
7.
Can you keep up the minimal physical touch?
If you know me, you know I don’t think much of physical touch but fall head over heels when I’m made to over-think and shown an unseen piece or playbook of the other side. I’m all in when it comes to how you make me feel, but I’m the girl who’d prefer a pat on my head, your head on mine, hand being held or even unexpectedly being pulled towards you. I don’t need you to kiss me or cuddle me everyday, I don’t need to be treated like your pet. I need to know you’re in this as much as I am-for good. In a crowd if you were to subtly sneak in a grip on my hand or hip, it’d be making my day without your knowledge.
