Useless things that stock market analysts say
How to sound smart about stocks even when you know nothing about them
Jul 26, 2017 · 2 min read

I am quite used to the inane stuff dished out by most analysts and the so-called experts on financial networks. However, I don’t know why but a tweet by another one of these experts (they come crawling out of the woodwork during bull markets) this morning did get my goat.
So, here is a list of things that these experts should be banned from saying on TV and on social media. Or one may use them whenever you want to sound smart about the markets.
- Markets will go up before they go down
- Markets will go down before they go up
- Stocks will be volatile in the near term (To be said wearing your best suit and with the proper gravitas)
- It’s a stock pickers market (Awesome analysis dude! How many sleepless nights did you spend coming up with this one ?)
- A correction is imminent (To be said repeatedly until proven correct)
- The easy money has been made (Use this to sound smart anytime the market rises)
- Market went up because there were more buyers than sellers (Duh?)
- I am optimistic about the markets in the long term but see a correction in the short term (Somebody get this guy a fence to sit on!)
- Market went down due to profit booking (To be used on a down day which occurs after an up day or days)
These are just a few from the top of my head. Feel free to suggest some more and I will add them to the list.
Thanks for reading. These are the author’s personal views and he reserves the right to be wrong!
