Insecure Season 3, Episode 3: Backwards-Like (or Get Away from Manipulative-ass Daniel)

Alana Noelle Black
Sep 9, 2018 · 5 min read

Here it is, at 26:29 something rarely spotted in the wild: the look of someone falling out of love instantly and in real time.

It’s over.

And they had just started to seem so couple-y, too. In Episode 2, we saw Issa supporting Daniel, initiating a connection between Daniel and maybe-future-collaborator Spyder. We even had an ostensibly life-or-death moment (but not really, ’cause y’all know they not killing the stars of the show) that made the two of them confront their insecurities around where they are in life. They’re not too far apart, it seems to us.

But Daniel has other ideas. He’s passionate about his work, unlike Issa, who he accuses of never being serious about anything and “all over the place.” The idea of Issa giving him career advice is laughable to him, damn near insulting. Never mind that she’s already given him advice that got him studio time with an actual successful producer. And with that, and these nine words, he obliterates years of longing: “I mean, I always save you from some shit.”

Does Daniel mean this? Is it something he wants to be true — does he hope that by saying this, Issa will say, “Yeah, you’re right” and…continue on in her state of underemployment and dependence? I don’t really care at this point. Even though he’s stagnating in his career and clearly worried about losing her in some way, Daniel is manipulating Issa, and his behavior here is abusive. His concern earlier in the episode about Issa not being property manager material? I could have bought that as a friend not wanting their other friend to just take the first job that came along, mixed with a dash (or eight) of liking to have their crush in their bed. But actively dissuading her by cutting her down when she’s trying to find her way in the world is the no-iest of nos.

Meanwhile, Molly is adjusting to life at her new firm…and by adjusting, I mean enumerating the ways her old firm did things differently, while occasionally commenting on the novelty of working in an office full of black people. I’m sure both of those things will get old fast, for all parties involved.

You know what, in this episode we get to see all of the Insecure characters at work. (Except for Tiffany, but she’s…working on a baby at the least, so.) Kelli all but crushes Issa’s dreams of being able to afford her own place (at least, one with its own bathroom) at her accounting/financial consulting job. Daniel does the same to his chance at a big break when he goes against Khalil and plays his version of a beat for Spyder rather than the agreed-upon collaboration.

And Issa, we get to see her excited about a potential job. Not the property manager position, which according to the next-episode previews it seems she takes, but whatever position she may take with The Beat Crew, an organization that works with musically gifted youth from communities of color that Issa saw at the job fair. I know from personal experience that when you’re feeling stuck at a job where you can’t find the way to advance — and maybe there’s not a way to do so there — even the slightest reminder that you have options or of why you got into the work in the first place can be a light at the end of the career ladder. (Even if it is just a tiny spark that turns out to be a bit of static electricity caused by reaching for the next rung.) Rinse and repeat for relationships, graduate programs, and et cetera.

I’m hopeful for our girl. When she tells her friends that she’s “finally seeing him for who he is,” in that last scene it truly seems like the truth. Plus she’s got possibilities. Which, while uncertain, are better than her just stagnating in place.

Random thoughts and observations:

· Getting head and Flamin’ Hot Cheetos simultaneously: dream come true or choking hazard? My non-multitasking behind leans toward the latter (but only by a hair).

· Frieda: “Did you know Kitty had a twin? She absorbed her in the womb.” Issa: “That tracks.” Also, Issa is fluent in French? Can’t she do some contract translation work or something? (Check out wegotyall.com for all of their fun facts.)

· Daniel asking about them mandolins, cuz. It’s clear that being a good producer is more important to him than being a successful one. And I’m not even convinced he’s necessarily much better than Khalil. At least Khalil knows what his client likes.

· Ahh, the sound of good friends telling you the truth even when you don’t wanna hear it. Issa: “So y’all just gonna Greek chorus on a bitch?” Molly, Kelli, and Tiffany. “Yeah.” Though I thought Kelli’s “You dumb bitch” after was too much, but it was Kelli being Kelli.

· I’m glad Issa got some time with Black We Got Y’all applicant Antoinette. I have wished for that chance on both sides of the application process but have never gotten it. Also, it served a dual purpose of kind of letting Antoinette know what was up and reminding Issa that she can move on to something else.

· Issa at the end of the episode, facing away from Daniel with all of the covers and metaphorically all of the power.

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