Married to a Closet Addict: A Birthday Celebration as a Distraction from the first withdrawal.

this was an eventful day. mixed . and odd and with some beautiful moments but i am still unsure still if they were even genuine..

one can never tell with the addict or at-least .. my addict .. i’ll call him that since the word husband gives me cringe energy. (yeah still not okay with the word on some days ..today is one of those )

anyway .. he had had a few days of chasing the dragon, as they call it. my memory is blurry .. i recall being invited to a birthday party. huge thing.. taco truck, blow up pool, slide thingee with the water and soap (somethign americans do — i guess im too european to be so familiar with that game i can recall it ? )

we took pictures. he had no swimming trunks. (such a lie — it as if he needed to buy things to fill a void.. and the best part of it was.. i was his wallet.

imagine.. years later i would be deemed.. the leech by his family. the toxic enablers. what a term,. anyway .. getting side tracked here . excuse the erm.. anger trying not to come through as i recall this day.

it was 2015 .. oh that year .. what a year !

originally published 19 january 2024