Pardon the shameless mirror selfies although quite frankly, I’m not ashamed to show off my body at all.
This is not an article on fitness or weight loss.
On the left is a picture of me when I was a skinny piece of shit. It was taken a few years ago.
I was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism then.
On the right is a picture of me taken recently, after I started working out a whole lot more.
There you have it. I have no fitness regimes or diet plans for you today.
This article is about realizing life can throw shit at you anytime without warning. But doesn’t mean you need to cower down and submit to life’s unpredictability.
So for those who’re in the dark…
Hyperthyroidism is an autoimmune disease. Basically, it can come out of nowhere. There’s pretty much no known cause or cure.
I am not fully healed. All I can do today is take meds to stabilize my condition over the long-term.
You’ve no idea how scary and real it is when you actually think you’re going to die
The symptoms hit me out of nowhere one fine month.
My hands started trembling uncontrollably for no reason.
My breathing became difficult.
My heart beat really fast even when I was in bed.
I experienced muscle weakness.
I tired out easily. I remember walking back home once and I actually had to sit down to rest. That was crazy considering coming home was an everyday affair.
All in all, I lost a total of 7KG (15 Pounds) in four weeks. Hence, the picture on the left.
I couldn’t do a thing.
I couldn’t practice my breakdancing. I literally lost all my moves. My friends were shocked to see me lose so much weight.
I finally went to get tested (and what do you know, the clinic had to fuck up my queue number)
It all happened really quick, like just three days.
After a couple of days of consultation with the doctor and a blood test, the receptionist called me up. The following conversation ensued:
“Mr. Tan? Your blood test results are in. Please come into the clinic immediately. The doctor wants to start treatment as soon as possible.”
“What? Really? What’s wrong me?”
“Oh it should be fine. Okay see you!”
That was it.
I ran out of the house. I grabbed a cab and scooted over.
On that day at the clinic, I waited an extra 45 minutes or so because they fucked up my queue number. Yes. It actually happened.
Things got better that day. I got my meds. I felt instantly better when I started taking them.
I thought life was back to normal, but it wasn’t
A couple of months later, I went back to the clinic for a followup.
That was when I received the news.
The doctor told me then that hyperthyroidism was a long-term condition and that I had to be on medication for years to come.
It really got to me there and then.
I kept thinking, “Wow. I’m not even 30 yet and I have to take meds everyday like an old, dying person.”
I was scared. I wondered if I would get something worse, like cancer by the time I hit 50 or something.
I was pissed off. I led a really healthy life and this shit had to fall upon me.
I was upset with life. When you think you got shit under control, it decides to throw you a new one.
Yeah. I was pretty down for a long while. I felt unmotivated to do anything.
But then I simply moved on with life.
Cause fuck luck.
Yeah you know… It’s easy to think that I had bad luck all the way.
The disease came out of nowhere even though I was healthy and fit.
The clinic had to, of all days screw up my queue number.
Did I mention that I also saw a private doctor a few weeks earlier on, who completely didn’t detect what I had at all? Yeah. He thought I was just under the weather then and prescribed me muscle relaxants.
But fuck luck
You make your own life, despite everything that has been thrown at you and even when you thought you were going to die.
I work out a lot more today. I’m 30 today and I’m stronger than ever.
Luck is bullshit. Heck, karma is bullshit.
Life is a mystery. Life is unpredictable. Those are facts, but that doesn’t mean it needs to get you down.
You just have to grab life by its balls and make it go the way you want.
Along the way, when shit doesn’t go down the way you want it to, it’s okay.
Just pick yourself up and carry on.
Take solace in the fact that there’ll always be a silver lining though
Apparently, my blood test results show that I’ve antibodies that will ensure that I’ll never get thyroid cancer.
I’m also immune to HEP B.
Most of all, I feel like I’ve conquered something others would have a hard time getting over. I feel like I’ve turned something bad inside out and made it into a force that would propel me forward to become super awesome. And as I’ve mentioned in my writing before, when bad shit happens, ultimately, it’d be something that can pull you out of darkness.
I’m really grateful for where I am today.
Shit was scary for sure, but at least I didn’t die or get something so permanent that I’d be bedridden or something.
Caveat: You need to do the work and stop being a moron
I remember talking to a fitness instructor acquaintance a long time ago. He was really buff, fit and ripped.
He was talking to me about staying healthy and all that.
I asked him then, “Why do you smoke then?”
He replied, “Bro. Do you want to grow up to be 90 and unable to enjoy life? I’d rather die earlier. So I do everything I want today to enjoy life and I’m okay if it shaves off a few years off my life.”
That was by far the fucking dumbest advice I’ve ever heard.
Of course, nobody fucking wants to be 90, bedridden, on a wheelchair, tired all day and simply waiting to die.
Should you choose to make bad choices, you’re not only not going to be live up till 90, but you may get some really bad shit along the way.
The point is not to be 35, and realize you’ve cancer.
The point is not to be 40, and realize you’ve have diabetes.
The point is not to be 50, and get a stroke, resulting in you being paralyzed permanently and your entirely family has to start taking care of you.
The point is to not intentionally wreck your life today when you can easily make the healthier choice.
And all of this can’t even help you escape the unpredictability of life, whether you like it or not.
You just keep trying your best though.
You don’t need to submit. There’re many things you can control.
You don’t need to lead a paranoid life. Just try your best to be happy and you’d be doing fine already.
So fuck luck.
Whatever happens, happens.
I hope this article inspires some people today.
Ending note: Please take care of your health. That matters the most. It comes first. Everything else can wait. Okay?
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Check out my other articles right here baby!
- The 6 stages all introverts go through as they grow up
- I’ve anger issues and this is why I choose to remain angry
- How to be the asshole with a heart of gold
My name is Alden Tan and I’m sick of bullshit in the personal development space thanks to the pretentious people out there. I love writing and I’m also a Bboy.
Get my free book here if you want to stay in touch with me: 12 Things Happy People Don’t Give a Fuck About!