What really is an anxiety disorder? Most people have heard of it, but don’t know what it is. Perhaps some of you don’t even want to know any information about obsessive-compulsive disorder, because it doesn’t affect you or someone close to you. After all, only mentally ill people or weirdos suffer from this, right? Unfortunately, the answer to all these questions is no.
I decided to write this article in order to help other people like me for whom shaking hands with other people is a nightmare. You are not alone and you are not crazy! The thing is, the common case shows that it is really hard to diagnose OCD. For instance, I have intrusive thoughts from many years, but didn’t realize how bad is it, until it affected my way of life, relationships with friends and family.
This is why I think knowing the signs of obsessive-compulsive disorder is crucial for living a relatively normal life while healing and asking for specialized help on time.
This article is also for those, who have a close relative or a friend whose behavior seems pretty odd, but that person absolutely rejects to share his/her thoughts and worries with you.(It is almost certain that the reason is shame.)

Who is Prone to Anxiety Disorders?

These personal characteristics do not mean you do have OCD. But if you are over-controlling, highly creative, sensitive and you have unrealistic high expectations about yourself…well, it is likely for you to be visited by the Monster Anxiety Disorder.
Of course, every one of us gets anxious from time to time. Will I graduate? How am I going to speak in public in front of all of these people? Being nervous before important exams is also normal. The situations in 21th century which may cause anxiety are many. But what differs the ordinary thoughts from the intrusive ones?

Symptoms

The first sign that something is not alright is when the thoughts that really bother you are highly unrealistic. A friend of mine fighting against OCD from years describes it like that: “When an intrusive thought appear in my mind, I can’t think of anything else. For example, yesterday morning the thought that I’ll die in a car crash crossed my mind. I felt unspeakable horror, although I know this is highly unrealistic. Who can tell the date and place of his death? Nobody. But I just can’t rid of the thought. No matter how hard I try to calm myself, the anxiety stays with me.”
The same happens with me. I am extremely irrationally frightened by germs, but I didn’t know about that until I started living with my room-mate Kate whilst studying in university. I have always known that I love cleanliness, but never thought of the opportunity that there is something wrong with that love before seeing Kate’s astonished look(she ‘caught’ me scrubbing the toilet seat at 3 o’clock in the morning. What was more awkward, I had cleaned it thoroughly twice the previous day. An other awkward thing is, I hire professional carpet cleaners every month).
Presumably, I was speechless. Kate’s look forced me to face the unpleasant fact that there is something wrong with me. No matter how hard I was denying my fear of germs, I failed to convince myself that everything’s right.

A. The Intense Fear Known as Panic Attacks

An other important symptom is the uncontrollable intense fear you experience after the ‘thoughts’ which is related to their implementation no matter how absurd it seems. Affected often have the feeling that some great threat is stalking them. Shortly after the panic attacks, compulsive thoughts appear.

B. Compulsive thoughts

‘I don’t go out, therefore I cannot die in a car crash. It is that simple.’
‘I’ll scrub everything I see, including toilet seats at 3 o’clock in the morning, therefore I cannot die from some awful disease those little tricky organisms spread.’
Those ‘thoughts’ are meant to calm us and sound like the voice of rationality, but the sad truth is that they are a part of the disorder. How can really scrubbing different surfaces will remove my whacking fear of germs? It cannot. It will calm me down for a day or two and then-the circle starts again’. This is why professional help is highly desirable.

What You Can Do

Nobody knows better than me that the shame is almost unbearable. You feel like you don’t belong to the ‘normal’ class of society just because you are too anxious. No sharing is allowed-no one will understand you, no one is willing to step in your shoes, friends gonna laugh at you.
Luckily, this is just an illusion your mind creates because of the fear that you will not be accepted with your peculiarities. The paradox is that you are your worst and dreadful enemy.
The truth is no one will understand you until you allow them. Just cross the invisible line between your own personal reality and the other individuals and soon you’ll find out there ARE people like you.
Search for them. Connect with them. This is how you’ll feel a part of the group. What is more, you may receive priceless advice how to deal with your irrational fears from someone, who is more advanced.