How To Meet The Guy
So many of my friends tell me that there are no men out there, that they are single because men have disappeared. It baffles me because I know that there are so many great guys out there. The same goes for men that tell there are no women out there - both genders complain and both are wrong. I have some good news for you. There are plenty of great men out there that are single. Take a step back and think how many men you meet every week? Is it one or two? If you meet one guy per week that means that in one year you will meet 52 men. From those 52 men not everybody will be your cup of tea, right? So imagine how many years it will take you to get the right guy and not settle for average. Imagine meeting 200 men in a year… How many years will it take you to meet a great guy and choose the best fit for you. So the solution is to meet new men.
First, let’s get one thing straight, men are everywhere. To meet new guys you have to give them an opportunity to meet you and you have to be open minded to let men talk to you and you have to talk to men as well. You see, most guys are shy speaking to a woman in a coffee shop or in any public place but I don’t mean everybody. There are those guys that come up to you in a night club drunk saying Hey babe, let me buy you a drink, and from those you need to run, run away far.
We as men don’t read between the lines. If you look at him once it doesn’t mean he will approach you and start speaking to you instantly. Let’s admit it, not most men are not perfect like I am, LOL, I’m joking of course. What you have to do is be more open to conversations and start speaking to them yourself. You want to attract the right guy, right? It doesn’t mean you will go over and say ‘Hey Babe, What’s up?’. Of course not, you are a woman that knows what she wants and has high value. Here are a few strategies that I want to share with you that you can apply today.
When you go for a coffee and you see a cute guy standing next to you, you can turn around and ask him in a very serious way: Listen I want your help. He will reply to you, Yes how can I help you? All men want to help women, it’s how we grow up, men want to feel that we are men, so then you say to him ‘What do you think I should get, a blueberry muffin or a lemon tart?’. Most probably he will have a grin on his face and suggest to you what he likes. If the option that he told you is the option that you like, say to him, Nice option, you have good taste. Now you started a conversation. A small note, please don’t start asking him where he lives, what he does and so on. I will write on this topic on another blog article. If he tells you that he prefers Lemon Tart and you prefer Blueberry, you can reply to him by saying in a playful way Oh, our taste doesn’t match, we are not a good match. This is an indication that he didn’t pass the ‘test’ even though he knows that it’s not a test, but his emotional brain will want to prove to you that he is worth it. Remember we are all emotional human beings. If the guy’s response is negative, for example I don’t know, you will eat it, just smile and move forward and order your Latte. You don’t need men like that in your life.
Let’s say you are going to a wine bar tonight and you see a hot guy standing next to you, what you can do to start a conversation is ask him for his help? Yes you need help. So you can pretend that you need to take off your coat or put your phone away and ask: Can you please help me? Can you please hold my glass of delicious wine? While he holds your wine glass he will start talking, or you can ask him if he is a wine guy or beer guy for example. Then you have another conversation going that seems like he started it.
The whole point of this is for you to start being more social and start speaking with everybody (women and men), at the bar, at coffee shops, petrol stations, everywhere. It doesn’t mean that you are attracted to all men that you speak to, it means you are a social woman that get’s connected. Men love women that know what they want and have their own lives. Once you get into a habit of speaking to people and meeting new people you will choose men based on the conversation. If you want to give the guy a chance to meet up with you (go on a quick coffee date) and get to know him. Now from meeting one guy per week to speaking to 20 guys per week you will have an option of 1,040 guys per year. Right? Don’t get confused, by meeting I don’t mean dating, I mean speaking and engaging. When you have more options, you decide what men are suitable to your standards, to your values. A lot of magazines, like Cosmopolitan, write articles and say that you should be hard to get and so on. Yes I agree, you shouldn’t be easy, but when you meet guys, you should be easy (friendly) for 1 minute with them, because it shows that you are different and you are an open minded women.
Look around you, locations to meet new guys are plenty. You don’t have to go to a night club to meet them, you can do whatever you are doing in your daily routine and still meet new men. Grocery stores, supermarkets, gym, coffee shops, on the road, libraries, retail stores everywhere! I don’t believe in luck, I believe we all create our own luck. When you do this for 52 weeks consistently and on the 50th week you start a conversation with a hot, intelligent, ambitious, funny guy, you meet up with him and connect emotionally with him and have an amazing relationship that leads to amazing things, your friends will start telling you that you are so lucky, but deep inside you will know that it might be luck that he was in that coffee shop on that day but you took actions and practiced for 50 weeks to speak to him confidently and get the guy.
When you start speaking with men, don’t use WhatsApp and text messages to start conversations. These tools help us to arrange a date, logistics and other small details but not to build emotional connections. Instead use your phone and call them or arrange to meet up with them and I will elaborate more on this in another article.
When you communicate with a guy don’t expect everything to be done by him. If he texts you and you reply with a ‘closed’ answer don’t expect a high value man to be running after you. I know so many women that like a guy that they date but when he texts them they reply with once sentence, like Great! Ask him a question back, or tease him. For me it shows laziness and lack of will to get the guy. If he tries to get in contact with you once, twice, three times and you don’t even try to reply with a positive attitude don’t expect him to be around for long. If you want to initiate a conversation with him you can text him a simple Hello, I just saw a guy that has a similar style to yours. If you don’t invest something in him, don’t expect him to invest in you. Don’t over invest in him, but invest something because high value men don’t chase women. Be playful with him and show that you are a fun and interesting woman.
Last but not least, It’s so much better to speak to someone offline rather than Tinder, Facebook, Instagram and so on. You can understand so much more if you meet a man for a 15 minute coffee rather than sending texts for a week. Go out there and get what you deserve.