What I think about religion
Sometimes is difficult to present me as an spiritist, is easier to tell people I’m agnostic. I can’t argue as a spiritist with other religion people since I don’t agree with all spiritism ideas in the first place. But is where I feel home, the sense of belonging and most ideas can reverb as an spiritist.
Even spiritists, don’t agree with each other. You can go into an spirit center (the temple or curch of that religion) some will believe in Alan Kardec and Chico Xavier and even some things borrowed from umbanda or alternative medicine. Other will defend only Kardec is right and the doutrine should pursue these acts as a desvirtue. I personally can’t believe none was right. Kardec writings have a lot of good things, but a lot of questionable ones. Chico Xavier, or every other medium, or the bible or any book can have good and bad things. Even science is not set in a stone, and so my religious beliefs couldn’t too.
It’s suffering to question everything, but no one said this path of life would be easy. I believe in reincarnation, and after life. But even this I question myself, I can’t accept none as a lie but not as a irrefutable truth either.
God I admit, if it exists, I don’t have any power or intention to understand. It’s a distant idea, since it’s power must excede time and space. Moral standards can’t be known for mere humans so I can’t define if God is good or bad since I can’t define what is good or bad myself, even for a pure human view. The whole chapter of spirit book, or the notion of biblical God loose it’s relevance with this form of thinking.
Jesus, a good man, but not God. Maybe a portion of it, or maybe nothing to do with divinity I don’t know. “Love your neighbor as yourself” makes some sense so I fallow it, but not because of divinity power. I can’t be sure of it either and can’t be sure if he existed or if it was some invention that the authors came up with to write about moral. As any other man or woman that came as a prophet I can’t be sure either.
Questioning is the only thing I can’t give up, accept something as irrefutable truth is not how things is. It’s counter intuitive, and can make me blind to facts in the wolrd. I question reincarnation itself, I only don’t question much because of the suffering of been mortal. It’s scary, but It’s a possibility.
If I am mortal I already dead, and all the human being if face of infinity. If it’s true is something I have to accept, but I still believe conscience is imortal and somehow lasts during various existences. It’s the only thing that keeps me hope that something last after my body go back to earth. I don’t have any definitive proof, but It’s one of the few things that I feel. It’s faith, but I will never be sure if it’s true. Even after death, since I will loose my memories. I’m not sure if on the “other side” I will remember everything or if it will die with my body leaving only the flame of consciousness to habit another body.
Someday I can study philosophy or theosophy but for now I’m not prepared to face anything. I still have intrusive thoughts about non-existence that scares me, but maybe someday I can face my own finitude in this world with peace and go after more knowledge, but what is truth anyway? Can anyone be sure that something is really true?
