In A Diseased Mind

You wake up and he’s there. So unexpected. You can sense the essence of evil. Getting the bad vibes by just looking at his eyes, such crazy eyes. You hear about him from your family. See pictures of him, see him staring at you. He’s in your life, he’s in your dreams. You think about him at school, you evil man, everything is drawn to you.

He has too much power now. Oh, I was a fool for not saying a word, keeping my mouth shut. Now I am your marionette, pull the string, pull the trigger.

Maybe I would care, if I was someone else. Someone who’s attractive, has friends, hobbies and dreams. A goal in life, something to look forward to. Someone with talent and opportunities. Just someone, someone who doesn’t have a diseased mind. Nothing I can do about it. I am the prisoner of my own mind. I am my own enemy. The decisions I make always turns out to be the wrong ones. Through my choices I created problems that weren’t even there. Then I suffer from the consequences and wallow in my own sadness.

How sad. What a waste of time. Jumping off from a 200 meter building doesn’t seem like a bad idea after all.