For Shoshanna, or, All my life I want money and power

a found poem from Taylor Swift’s Rolling Stone cover story, September 8, 2014

I moved to New York
and every day was a struggle
forget making plans for life
we were just trying to make it to next week

if you’re not in love New York is like
this blazing bonfire and no one is in control
be afraid of it because it’s so powerful
stand near it because it makes you brighter

if you’re not in love…
it’s not that I’ve sworn off love
but I don’t have the energy
I’m realistic about this

(I have to stop myself
from thinking about how
many aspects of being happy
I don’t understand)

I can’t be ungrateful
I chose this
but sometimes — sometimes — I want to
walk around naked with my windows open