Suffering & Misery; or, Ana in purgatory

a found poem in which Dakota Johnson is probably a ghost, from her 2015 Vogue feature, January 20, 2015

I have no idea
 who
I am
 or
 where
I am

nobody recognizes me
it’s terrifying

a strange place
 — I’ve never seen anything like it
you really can’t leave
like being in Alcatraz

(I have bizarre anxiety
about being a trained animal
a black leopard
a three-legged cheetah)

…I won’t come back from this.

I know that voice!
I can hear my grandmother!

this is my slow
 trickling
 descent
 into madness