Someday You Will Know

7 years have passed since I last saw him….

7 years have passed since I last felt him…..

7 years have passed since I last had him….

Years passed so soon and there I was….

Standing in front of his door

Waiting for him to open it eagerly for me….

Waiting for him to run and come towards me…

Waiting for him to greet me and hug me….

But just then… something caused my steps to freez…

An undesired thought had conquered my brain…

Will he still think of me…..

Will he still care for me…

Will he still admire me the way he used to do….

Will he still love me…..

What if the time had changed his thoughts about me…

What if the time had changed his mindset and priorities…..

What if I didn’t held any importance in his life…

What if someone else had replaced me…

What if I didn’t existed for him anymore…

As I advanced towards the door, something resisted my pace….

And the door opened followed by someone who appeared like a grey figure in the dim light of dusk…

It was the innocence of a cute small girl holding the hand of her beautiful mother…

Maybe this was the first time when someone’s innocence filled my heart with fear….

Fear of him having someone else in his life……

Fear of hoping that the lady could be the lawful wife of the man who means the world to me…..

Fear of hoping that the child could hold the most special place in his heart……..

The place that once belonged to me

Fear of waiting worthlessly for him… And most importantly,

Fear of loosing him…..

I retraced my steps backwards as I felt it useless to approach him….

Maybe I didn’t wanted to be selfish this time…

Maybe my heart felt something for the lady……

maybe I didnt wanted to separate a daughter from the man who meant the world to me.

Maybe I didn’t wanted to steal someone’s husband even when I was sure I loved him more…..

More than she could ever imagine in her dreams.

Maybe I didn’t wanted to disturb their happy life…

Maybe because I felt this was something I could do for him….

To letting him forget me …..

To letting him live….. without ever thinking about me….

To leave him and his life undisturbed….

May be because it was too late for him now…..

Maybe because it was too late for him to imagne his life with me….

Maybe the thought was just impossible for us……

I returned back….coz I had finally understood……

Maybe I belonged to him but he belonged to someone else…….