17 Things Life Had Taught Me Before I Turned 18

Ally
Ally
Jul 28, 2017 · 3 min read

We all grow up at different paces. Some of us see the world for what it truly is much earlier than the others. I remember crying the day I clearly understood the lyrics of Dance With My Father. Just as the song was sad in general, the first two lines was what truly hit me: “Back when I was a child, before life removed all the innocence.” Turning eighteen was one of the things I truly looked forward to when I was younger, but the journey wasn’t a smooth one to say the least. I’d like to share some of the most painful realizations and lessons that the universe has crafted so I in turn become the person I am today. I hope you will be able to reflect and take them to heart as much as I did and continually do.

  1. Fall in love with yourself. Change what you can and accept what you couldn’t. You possess beauty others only wish for — all you have to do is look.
  2. Once you realize how much you’re worth, you become invincible. Only you truly ever know what you are capable of.
  3. Tell your Mom and Dad how much you love them. Kiss your little sister when you tuck her to bed. Tell your best friend how grateful you are for her existence. Let that boy know how much you loved him for years. Wear your heart on your sleeve — love fiercely the way someone dying resists their final breath just to be able to say “I love you” one last time.
  4. It’s okay to put yourself first. It’s okay to be selfish sometimes.
  5. Stand up for yourself. You weren’t raised to be a mess on your knees.
  6. Be sensitive. Not everyone has the same capacity as each other. Some are empty, some half-full, some full to the brim. Choose your words.
  7. Your struggles are valid. Do not let them invalidate your suffering by saying there is worse. You have the right to feel.
  8. Growth is inevitable. Stop standing behind the camera and start acting out the scenes. Reflect on what Kevin McCallister said to the Bird Lady in Home Alone 2: “I had a nice pair of roller blades. I was afraid to wreck them, so I kept them in a box. Do you know what happened? I outgrew them. I never wore them outside. Only in my room a few times.”
  9. You are capable of so much more. You can always be kinder. Always be stronger. Always be smarter. Always be more beautiful. You can do so much more than you let yourself believe, as long as you put your mind and heart into it.
  10. Allow yourself to get angry. You are not a saint. It’s okay to cry angry tears and break something and slam the door behind you. Sometimes it’s easier to forgive that way. But do not let your anger rob you of what Anne Frank believed is there. “In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart.”
  11. Make the first move. They’re dying to talk to you, too.
  12. Start somewhere. No flower grows where a seed isn’t planted.
  13. Be kind. The world may have traces of ugly but that isn’t all there is to it. Contribute to its beauty.
  14. You don’t have to pretend like everything’s okay. Cry. Even sunny days end in rain sometimes.
  15. Take care of yourself. You are everything to someone. You complete a home, a group of friends, a universe. Things wouldn’t be the same without you.
  16. It’s okay to let others take care of you. You’re not Atlas. There will always be a shoulder willing to help you carry your burdens. Sometimes it’s best to let go of the weight.
  17. Only you can make things better for yourself. Though there are hands willing to hold you up when you’re down, at the end of the day all you’ve truly got is yourself. It is you who will convince yourself to wash your face and go to bed. It is you who will decide whether to walk or take the bus to school tomorrow. It is you who will draw the curtains and open the windows when the morning comes. I hope you choose to let the sun in.

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