Truth In Satire

This Trash Can Is Not President Trump — It Just Looks Like Him

Cases of mistaken identity are being reported around the globe

“The likeness was so eerily similar, I saluted to the trash bin,” said an American soldier stationed in Europe, who was on leave in Paris. “I know the other guys in my unit were also confused.”

The trash receptacle in the photo above is not Donald Trump — and the French owner of the garbage bin wants to set the record straight.

According to eye witnesses, a group of Japanese tourists was passing by the fully-loaded trash bin in Paris’ 4th Arrondissement, when one of the tourists mistook it for President Trump.

This automobile loaded with hay outside of Capetown, SA, has also been mistaken for the president. It is not. (Photo: Andrew H. Walker)

The others in the group grew excited, reached for their cameras, and started snapping photos of the yellow-topped garbage can, convinced they were in the company of the 45th President of the United States. Several even stood next to the receptacle to snap selfies.

Only after a municipal garbage truck arrived to collect the trash did the Japanese visitors realize that it was not Donald Trump and moved on.

A local newspaper in Ames, IA identified this ear of partially shucked corn as Mr. trump in an article about the immigration ban. The paper ran a correction the next day.

This was not the first case of mistaken identity related to the new American president. Many photographs are circulating on the Internet purported to be the president — but the sightings have all turned out to be false. In several cases it was just a yellow corn stalk or an unruly horse’s tail that shared salient characteristics with the president.

Law enforcement authorities in nations around the globe are asking their citizens and visiting tourists to be more careful in declaring presidential sightings, as the ensuing excitement, commotion, and street protests can pose a public safety risk.

A horse’s ass (right) has been incorrectly identified by many as the Commander In Chief, too. Veterinarians have confirmed that it is merely a horse’s butthole.

They added, however, that the president’s resemblance to many animate and inanimate objects is making it hard for people to see the distinction, especially non-Americans who may not be as familiar with President Trump’s yellow toupee and orange complexion. So far, furry caterpillars, hamsters, certain breeds of squirrel, exotic roosters, ripe oranges, and even a piece of yellowtail sushi were mistakenly identified as the president.

“We have studied a number of these photographs and have concluded that they are not attempts at identity theft or an effort to impersonate a sitting U.S. president,” said a senior officer at Interpol. “These were merely cases of an odd assortment of things having a startling resemblance to the American leader. We have found no criminality whatsoever, and despite President Trump’s repeated insistence that we open a formal investigation, we will not. Case closed.”

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Thanks to all the many readers, fans, followers, and even my frenemies, for reading and commenting on my posts throughout the year as I continue my commitment to post every day, 7-days-a-week until the Orange Accident is out of our hair.

I read every comment. And I try to answer as many as possible.

Thank you.

–AI