Wikileaks Bombshell: Bushes and Clintons Interbreeding To Develop Race of “SuperPols”

Conspiracy by first families to control White House began in 1993

A little too chummy? Not when your families are secretly plotting to dominate national politics with stepford children.

According to private emails released by Wikileaks today, the Bush and Clinton families have been conspiring to dominate American politics for up to eight future generations through a highly secretive, inter-familial scheme of crossbreeding. The intent has been to develop a lineage of extraordinarily intelligent, genetically predisposed “superpols” who would be unbeatable in national elections.

Wikileaks broke the story just as Americans were registering the fact that if Hillary Clinton wins the upcoming election, and serves for two terms, a Bush or Clinton would be occupying the White House for 20 of the previous 28 years.

“That is pretty much the textbook definition of an oligarchy,” commented Virgil Peterson, Professor of Politics at Princeton University. “When you have a very small group of people — just two families, in this case — controlling a government, you have moved past the egalitarian principles of a true democracy and slipped into an aristocratic oligarchy.” Professor Peterson went on to say that if the accusations are true, the interbreeding scheme is “startlingly un-American and probably indictable.”

According to the email leaks, the plot was originally conceived by George H. Bush when he was CIA Director in 1976. But it wasn’t until after he left the presidency in 1993, and started considering the larger implications of inter-familial crossbreeding to retain power, that he implemented a plan with the full cooperation of the Clintons.

One email excerpt, sent by the senior Bush to his daughter Dorothy Bush Koch in June of 1993, tracks the genesis of the plan: “I have been talking privately with Bill Clinton about our families…with the possibility of merging our seed to plant generations of highly qualified candidates in key political positions, particularly the White House, for up to 120 years.” He added, “I would like you and your brothers to cooperate fully,” to which Bush’s only daughter replied, “Of course, father, how would you like me to begin.”

The Wikileaks trove included a hacked email from 1996 in which Bill Clinton provided a detailed schematic to Bush Sr. of a future family tree. Clinton, who was president at the time, wrote in the classified email: “First, I’ll impregnate your son Neil’s daughter Ashley as soon as she comes of age. Then Jeb’s son John Ellis will knock up my daughter Chelsea when she is ready to conceive.” The detailed plan went on to include more than 34 sexual unions between various members of the Bush and Clinton clans, in which President Clinton insinuated himself into 26 of the cross-breeding scenarios. Notably, he included George W. Bush in only one scenario, in which he sleeps with Hillary at a date seemingly well into her menopausal years.

At one point in the email thread, President Clinton asks the elder Bush if he thinks Jimmy Carter’s family should be included in the plan, to which Bush replies, “Carter!? Hell no, I don’t want that hillbilly peanut farmer messing up our gene pool. You might be a country bumpkin but at least you’re a Rhodes Scholar.”

Also released by Wikileaks was a confidential email from Walker Bush, the son of Marvin Bush, to his cousin Barbara in New York, asking, “Do you think Grandpa would allow any of the Obama girls to be part of this crossbreeding stuff — because that Sasha is really cute?” to which she dismissively replies, “Are you fucked up, cuz — what drugs are you on?”

An FBI team has been formed to investigate the emails and allegations of crossbreeding for political purposes. However, there may be a conflict of interest as the senior FBI investigator assigned to the case is Special Agent Sam LeBlond, the 32-year-old son of Dorothy Bush Koch.