This is about a meditation practice that focuses on Female Orgasm.
So what’s up with Frames? And what about Noticing- what’s the point?
Isn’t there some sort of secret, esoteric meaning buried in the lost scrolls of Orgasmic Meditation (called OM for short)?
Well, we may never know. But some ideas are out there. As someone who has stroked more pussy than Wilt Chamberlain and Fidel Castro combined (using only a single finger, mind you), I’m telling you how powerful these two steps can be.
Other than a.) creating intimacy and b.) having a mysteriously grounding effect, it has been found that these steps create some pretty awesome results in the lives of practitioners.
So, what are these other results?
In order to convey them, lets start with a term: Primary Experience–the sensory experience that enters our sphere of consciousness prior to the interpretations we have about them. For example…
Let’s take something we see with our eyes. Simply put, the visual Primary Experience is the neural impulse that our brain receives when light enters our eye. When our brain processes this impulse we not only begin to see things, we also begin to name and interpret them- colors, shapes, familiar objects, beautiful things, people, family members, threatening creatures, things that remind us of childhood, rare and valuable possessions, etc.. The more layers of interpretation these experiences pass through, the more abstracted, augmented, and even distorted they become.
By giving value and judgement-neutral Noticing and Frames in our OM practice, we establish a closer connection with our experience at a low level of abstraction- which is a big fancy way of saying we get closer to the Primary Experience of what we’re experiencing . Long story short, it is a VERY powerful tool for helping loosen the social, cultural, and traumatic conditioning we have around sexual and intimate experiences.
Awesome. That makes sense. So *how*, exactly, do these parts of the practice help us to re-work the template with which we relate to the world?
Particularly, in a practice such as OM where we use the practice to wake up to life and come closer to our whole true selves, it’s important to develop our capacity to cut through our conditioning.
As we go through life we develop a series of filters through which our sensory experience is received, augmented, and interpreted. These filters are made up of our past experiences: images, sounds, smells, feelings, so on. And these augmented representations of the world and other people comprise a template that ultimately determines our behavior within and in relation to the environment around us–and in turn the quality of our lives. (Which is just a way of saying we have a bunch of memories that inform how we act here in the now.)
If we want to change our behavior and the way we feel we must change the filters through which our Primary Experience of the world passes. Likewise, if we change our behavior, we change our experiences, and in turn we begin to change our internal maps.
Giving clean frames and noticing is a way to anchor ourselves to a level of communication that is free from the social conditioning that often chokes the life out of our sex. It’s a way of dropping the cultural residue that would further color, distort, and generalize the perfect lens with which our body receives sensory input. It transmits a more universally relatable communication about what we’ve just experienced. And it will translate into the rest of your life as better communication habits, better relationships, and better sex with your partners.
To end, I will say this: noticing what you don’t say is as important as noticing what you do say. Noticing your preference of observation and your adherence to any perceived unspoken rules of etiquette will take your a layer deeper in your practice. I Suggest the following homework: for the next five OMs give clean Noticing and Frames- and don’t give the same old ones that you might be used to giving. Give the vulnerable one, or the one that’s difficult and new.
(i.e I’m used to talking about the direction in which her inner labia rest and the quality and color of the inner labial skin. It’s easy. What’s difficult for me is talking about and describing the way the skin right below her introitus has tiny cup-shaped ruffles, and how that barely visible blue vein beneath the skin of her outer left labia is visible; the way the skin of her hood has a bumpy texture with the quality of goose-bumps; how her ejaculate is semi-transparent white; how the top of the hood is a pale peach color and the bottom is a plum-rouge)