A Force for Good: 13 Daily Reminders that Can’t Help but Make You Happy.

Yup. I’m doing it. I am writing a life list. I am joining the plethora of self-help enthusiasts who continue to search for cure-all answers to our burning and ever painful life questions. If instead you want to sit and soak up your own self-pity, I get it. You do you. But eventually, we happiness seekers hit a point in our wallowing that shouts back, “get up you sad sack of sh**!” “Do something about it, or accept your own defeat”. So I did. I left the dark side for a force of good, and I haven’t looked back since. Here I am, getting a hold on my own personal happiness, bearing my soul for all the world to see, in hopes, selfishly, that my ideas are actually as brilliant as I think they are. You guys let me know.

I got a job this week. I know, super great. It got me thinking of what I should do with my last week of freedom before I am engulfed in the ever consuming life of an eight to fiver. That list is for another time, but writing something here has been on my mind for months now. So I am taking that leap while I have the chance. I am typing simply to keep up with my brain, otherwise you would all be reading a picture from the pages of my journal right now. You are welcome.

Anyway….

Yes. I am writing a list. A list of things that can and should make me happy on a daily basis. The list is a product of sheer necessity. As a twenty-something, I am constantly rattled by the uncertainty and complete disorganization of it all. My list was made to calm the cycling thoughts that keep me up at night, and the tense, unsatisfied feeling I experienced all day that kept me from enjoying anything to its fullest. Sound familiar? I sat down and said, “what, very simply, would make me feel content, complete at the end of the day?” I should warn that this list does not include solutions to goals like, “lose 15 pounds” or “spend more time with my nana”. Those are closed items that, once completed, we will be looking for peace elsewhere once again. It is simple. What makes you happy? Do you like playing games? Why? For the strategy? The competition? The exercise? The social component? What is it? This list is less about activities and goals, and more about the fundamental roots of happiness. The various components of health: Mental, Social, Physical, Emotional, Occupational, Spiritual, Environmental. These are my checklist items in an effort to reach balance. Wellness. Happiness. Take from my list what you will…

1. Rise with the sun

I know I just lost about half of you, but hear me out. Making it a point to get as many productive hours out of the day as possible has been hugely beneficial for me. Despite my inability to make it to first period on time all throughout high school, I am much more productive in the morning. Forcing myself to rise earlier helps me to get more done, have some peace and quiet before the rush of the day, and has regularized my sleep cycle.

2. Go outside

I love the outdoors. Some of you may not and the thought of it seems pointless and uncomfortable. Being from San Diego, I really have no good reason not to go outside, but even if you do, just do it anyway. Soak up any vitamin D you can find, breathe in the freshest air available, and take it all in… 10 minutes. It’s all I am asking. Then you can head back in to your heaters, footie pajamas, and Netflix marathons.

3. Educate Yourself

Learn something every day. Be better, know more than you did yesterday. This has become imperative to calming that pesky anxious mind of mine. Feeling unsatisfied? Improve, grow, challenge yourself.

4. Express Yourself

Write. Draw. Dance. Craft. Build a bench. Forge a candle stick holder. Play the harp. Whatever it is, tap into your ability to create and express it. Release all that subconscious tension and take time to do something for your own enjoyment.

5. Be nice to your body

This is an all encompassing statement for multiple components. Your body puts up with a lot of shit from you. Treat it well. Be nice to it as much as possible. As a health enthusiast, I could really go on and on about this. But i’ll narrow it down to a few simple items everyone can get on board with.

Break a sweat: Exert yourself

Get out of bed, off the couch, and whatever else you do to stay as comfy as possible and exert yourself! Activate your body. It isn’t meant to sit in an office chair all day, with our necks cranked down looking at phones, computers, tablets, pagers, tamagotchis, etc. etc. etc. MOVE! Whether it be formal exercise or just working up a sweat doing chores around the house, just get going. Let the endorphins flow, and the self-admiration begin!

Fuel your body Nutritiously

Eat for fuel. Realize that your body cannot solely run off hot pockets and left overs from the staff lounge. Plan ahead and eat well. Do your best. You’ll have more energy, support your immune system, and just feel a whole lot better about yourself.

Drink water

It’s a like a shower for your insides. It keeps you clean in there! Not to mention our bodies are like made of the stuff. Just do it. Drink water.

Yoga, stretch, etc.

I took a yoga class for the first time my final semester of college. Magic. Seriously. Just taking some time every day to reconnect with our bods and stretch it all out is amazing. If you can’t get zen enough for that hippie crap, just stretch. Your 82 year-old self (or 32 year-old self) will thank you for it.

6. Slow down: Be present

I cannot tell you how many times I’m suddenly brought back to reality while brushing my teeth only to find myself doing it so vigorously I seem to be banishing my gums from my mouth. Slow down! Be mindful of what you are doing. My stress management professor said once that she enjoyed doing the dishes. Yes, the dishes. She liked the feeling of the warm bubbly water on her hands. When’s the last time that you stopped to take in all 5 of your senses in any given moment? Maybe never. Feel the ground under your feet as you walk. Soak up the warmth of the sun, or the chill on your cheeks. Feel it all. This often helps me shift my focus from the stresses of everyday life and give my nerves a break. It also helps me to get the most out of any mundane or new activity. Take it all in and see what you find.

7. Make Connections

In this day and age, this one shouldn’t be hard. But go further. Don’t just “like” someone’s post on Facebook, reach out to the people and opportunities around you. Truly connect with another on a daily basis. Maybe bond over mascara choices in the drug store with a fellow brows-on-fleeker, or finally comment on that medium writer’s work that resonated with you. Call your nana, send thank-yous, have conversation for the sake of conversation. Connect with the world and people around you. Sometimes I literally have to push myself to do this. I love being a troll in my pajamas all day watching endless reruns of Friends or Twilight Zone marathons as much as the next person, but being an active part of the world around me really has made me a much happier gal.

8. Maintain your boundaries

This may be harder for some than others, and if you do not already have boundaries, clear your schedule for today and go make some. Decide what you are and are not okay with; make clear lines around where you stand. Nobody likes wishy-washy people. This may sound like a “don’t take shit from yo man” speech, or a “you deserve better” piece, but I am serious. No matter who you are — age, race, sex, gender, sexual orientation, SES, religion, etc. — you can command respect and deserve to receive it. Know what you deserve and how you should be treated, and do not settle for anything less. Now before your girlfriend goes and accuses me of turning you into an asshole, remember to be kind but firm. You can in fact stand your ground while being a mature, calm, and respectful human being.

9. Forgive

People always think of forgiveness as something given to someone else; forgiveness is about and for you. Let go of that hate and resentment holding you back from any level of peace in your life. Accept that people really can be that ignorant and incapable (even yourself), and move on. The only person that suffers from your angry dwelling is you.

10. Act in accordance with your goals

This is where those “lose 15 pound” goals come in. Again, if you haven’t laid out specific achievements you would like to attain, clear your schedule. Write them down, and do something, anything, each day that moves you forward in the process of attaining them.

11. Indulge within your means

So by now, you may feel like you will be a saint if you do all of this each and every day. You won’t be. Some days you may only get through half. Sometimes that will be enough to be happy, and some days it won’t. You will continue to be imperfect the rest of your life and that is completely okay. Accept some failure, give yourself some leeway, and indulge in your guilty pleasures… but leave the guilt for the perpetrators in court. You have done nothing wrong. Treat yourself every once and a while, and do not feel bad for a second. Enjoy it. Embrace it. Entwine it into your perfection-strived life. Make indulgence fit for the sake of your sanity (and the sanity of everyone around you).

12. Attitude of gratitude: Meditate, pray, whatever!

Every day, I take a moment to calm down, collect my thoughts, and entirely focus on how thankful I am for all the goodness that enters my life. No matter how hard life gets, it almost always could be harder. Take a second to appreciate whatever it is you got: a roof over your head, a family, an education, a beautiful environment, a healthy body, friends, access to information, resources, an able mind, etc. Realize that much of that is circumstantial and you are truly lucky to have it. Being thankful brings me back to reality. It quiets all the tedious commotion and complaining in our minds, and makes us get real about life. Life’s good. Appreciate each day for the opportunity that it is.

13. Make positive contributions

Finally, be a positive contribution to this world. There is so much negativity that floats around, and sometimes people really are that incapable of doing any better. Whenever possible, be that beam of positivity, that helping hand, that source of knowledge for those around you. Make the extra effort to add goodness, and reap the reward of a happier surrounding. Bringing others up improves our own mood, and satisfies that selfish need for the intrinsic reward of being a good human being. So when your grandma will not shut up about how the construction across the street is blocking her driveway even though she never leaves and can’t even drive, shed some light on a more positive perspective. Make the world a better place by being the better person when somebody else clearly needs it.

So there you have it. Idealistic? Maybe. A little Miss America? Probably. But it’s real. This is truly the list of reminders I look at each and every day. It has worked wonders for my happiness and overall satisfaction. I think it can for you too, or some other form of it. But again, if you prefer to sit in your own self-loathing for another 6 months or so, I get it. Do it. Us happiness hackers will continue on in the pursuit of persuading you over to the light. “May the force be with you”… or something catchy like that.