I don’t think it’s just women, though gender invalidation of men comes in different forms. Think of small, less-strong, femme men who get called “sissy” and “pussy” and “bitch” — including at times being raped by men who would just as soon rape a woman or a femme-ish man (or maybe even prefer the femme man as the target of rape).
Thanks Allison. Terrific article. Am saving it and filing it for future use. Plus have now signed for more from you by email. Looking forward to being in touch. I am loving Medium. And hey, today is my Medium Birthday. First story posted. Well poem. Story. Whatever.
You made the right decision. Trans women in locker rooms (or anywhere else) just want to be treated like any other woman. A friendly compliment about her scarf might make her feel welcome, but only if it could be done without seeming like you were going out of your way specifically to make her feel welcome. It’s a very fine line to walk.