What You Really Mean When You Say You’re Not a Feminist

I can’t tell you how many times well-meaning folks have started a discussion with me by saying “I’m not a feminist, BUT…” followed by describing their very feminist beliefs and thinly veiled reasons for not identifying as feminist.

It’s not just men, it’s women too. Both genders are guilty of this behavior.

You might be thinking, “Well, what’s the harm in not identifying as a feminist when you do believe in gender equality?”

Feminism vs Gender Equality

To answer that question, it’s important to note the linguistic difference between “feminism” and “gender equality.”

First of all, feminism literally means gender equality. If anyone tries to tell you differently, they haven’t studied feminism on even a surface level.

Disclaimer: Masculinity is NOT synonymous with men. Femininity is NOT synonymous with women. These are terms used to describe how society values certain traits and roles that we’ve happened to assign to the genders.

Don’t quite understand what that means? Here’s a thought exercise to demonstrate the social value of masculinity over femininity: Who is given more respect in Western society — a woman who’s attracted to other women and expresses herself masculinely or a man…