How To Stop Feeling Inadequate

If you’ve ever felt inadequate (and I know you have) what did you do about it?

Maybe you’ve sat in a crowded room listening to the people around you having intelligent conversations you couldn’t even begin to understand. Or you’re looking around and see everyone dressed to the nines and think to yourself you’ll never look that good.

Maybe it’s when you scroll through instagram and compare yourself to the travel blogger who seems to be living your dream life. Or when your ex starts seeing someone knew, you can’t help but wonder what do they have that I don’t?

Did you get up and walk away? Did you stop scrolling and turn off your phone?

That seems like the most logical thing to do at the time but it’s easier said than done. Feeling inadequate is such a normal and natural feeling. It’s not a good feeling, but the first thing to remember is that it does happen to everyone.

Yes, even that CEO or travel blogger.

If you’re anything like me, you have a hard time walking away or turning off your phone. I usually grasp for some type of reassurance or throw myself so deep into my work that I block out the feelings of not being good enough. But of course that only works for so long until I need to come up for air.

Atelophobia: The fear of not being good enough.

This fear can eat away at you causing you so much self doubt that it stops you right in your tracks and puts a hold on reaching your goals. No matter what happens in your life, there will always be moments when you don’t feel good enough.

How do you stop feeling inadequate?

1. Change The Dialogue In Your Head

It’s all about the way you talk to yourself. The self deprecating thoughts need to go! The easiest way to do this is by changing just simple three letter words. By adding “yet” to the end of your sentence it automatically turns your fixed mindset into a growth mindset.

For example: “I don’t have my dream job.” -> “I don’t have my dream job yet.”

Just because you haven’t accomplished your dream job at this point in your life, doesn’t mean you wont. The word “yet” gives you the positive outlook that you are still growing and learning. You will make it happen, it just hasn’t happened yet!

You can also replace the word “but” with “and”. When you use “but” in a sentence you are erasing anything that was said before. When you change it to “and”, you are able to see things from a different perspective.

For example: “I ran 5 miles but I need to eat healthier.” -> “I ran 5 miles and I need to eat healthier.”

Give credit where credit is due. Don’t disregard your 5 mile run just because you didn’t eat well today. The word “and” let’s you appreciate the hard work you have done and opens up the path for the goals you haven’t reached yet!

Those small three letter words make a big difference.

2. Remember That Perfection Is Boring

If everyone was perfect, could you imagine how uneventful life would be? You’re not supposed to be your best self every single day. That’s why we are constantly growing and changing. Mistakes and the wrong turns we make lead us to more knowledge and growth.

Think back to that time you felt like you really messed up. Probably felt like the end of the world, right? You bounced back though. Your mistake created this experience in your life that was first of all, definitely not boring! And second, taught you a valuable lesson and helped you improve as a person.

3. Make An Inventory of Your Time

This is a very valuable tool to help you better understand why you might be feeling inadequate. Start by thinking about the aspects in your life you’re not feeling good enough for.

For example: Your friendships. If you’re feeling inadequate within your friendships, make an inventory of all the time you spend with your friends. Are you putting in the same amount of effort they are?

This helps you realize that there might be some areas you need to put a little more work into to help yourself feel like you are enough. The way you spend your time will demonstrate why you might feel inadequate about that certain subject.

4. Mute, Block and Delete!

Social media is so prevalent in our lives these days. When it’s used properly it can be a great tool to express yourself, stay in touch with friends and provide lots of entertainment. But often social media can make you feel like everyone is living their best life except for you.

News Flash: Instagram is a highlight reel.

You go on vacation with your family of course you will post the cute picture you took laughing at the beach compared to the one you took in the hotel bathroom mirror showing off your third degree sunburn.

The best thing to do is detoxify your social media feeds. Mute, block or delete any page that don’t make you feel good about yourself. This will automatically stop the feelings of being inadequate as you scroll down your news feed. Replace these pages with positive ones like funny meme pages or inspirational quotes.

You have control over your social media feeds, don’t let someone else’s highlight reel make you feel like you aren’t living your best life!

I could give you lots more tips on how could potentially help you stop feeling inadequate in your life. You’d maybe apply them to your life for awhile but it wont ever be a permanent fix. The only thing that will make you feel good enough, is believing in yourself.

If I could give you a guidebook on how to believe in yourself and gain confidence, I totally would. The only thing that will help you do that is experience and taking the time to learn how to love and accept yourself.

You are good enough, it’s just time to believe that yourself!